Adult daughter just diagnosed

[4yrride]

My 22 year old dsughter was just 'formally' diagnosed with BPD and major depressive episode after a suicide attempt 6 weeks ago. I feel like the last four years have been a roller coaster-thought this past 6 months things had improved. She was inpatient for a week, discharged to a partial hospitalization program. Psychiatrist wants her to stop the program and think she will benefit from one on one therapy. Redid her meds. It's been a rollercoaster. Things still feel uncertain.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[wendydarling]

Hello 4yrride and welcome to bpdfamily parenting board, I'm glad you found us. 

I'm so very sorry to hear of your daughter's struggles and the exhausting rollercoaster you've experienced over the last four years.    You are not alone, we understand - many here have similar journeys as you may have read, including me, I was where you are now in 2015. I so understand when you say things are uncertain, it's so much to take on board.

We can support you while you learn how best to support your daughter through the tools and lessons to the right of your screen. bpdfamily has helped me understand the broad umbrella of a BPD diagnosis and the context of where my daughter sits in the diagnosis (she is a quiet person with BPD) and what I can do to help my 28yr old adult. bpdfamily and members have provided me the knowledge and advice to ask the right questions with medics. Knowledge helps us make the right choices and decisions for our loved ones.

Have the medical team suggested dialectal behaviour therapy (DBT)? which  involves learning how to manage emotional dysregulation through learning skills (2.5 hours a week) and a weekly one hour meeting with a therapist who is also available to the patient 24/7 by phone.  If not - ask them, my daughter is a couple months into DBT as an outpatient and doing very well  . It's the recommended route for BPD.

My daughter lives at home, does yours? Do you have support from family members or friends? 

I found the diagnosis immensely challenging like all members it's a shock, that said it's helped my daughter and I to do what we need to do and that is change our journey and expectations and be realistic of where we are, now.

We look forward to supporting you at this difficult time.

WDx 

[4yrride]

She was in a partial hospitalization program and the attending psychitriat has taken her out because he felt it is not benefitting her- said she requires one on one care. Her first appointment with another psychiatrist was yesterday- he did an 'interview' that was about 2.5 hours. This psych doc seeing her yesterday works collaboratively with her attending. I felt positive because he discussed eliminating the benzo meds prescribed (they're addictive and she has a bit of an addiction issue with marijuana and past issue with alcohol).  He will also be serving as her psychotherapist going forward. He discussed a possible restructure of meds and discussed 'treating the disorder, not putting a bandaid on the symptoms of the disorder'.   I have not asked about DBT yet as we just got in. Will ask at next appointment next week. we were 'episode' free for about a week only tonight she is agitated.   She does not live with me, but lives with her fiance and young son (17 months old).

[wendydarling]

It's good to hear that your daughters care is escalating to one on one care, a full review of meds taking place and the residing psychiatrist will be working forwards with your daughter. All positive steps forward. Is your daughter now at home as you say she is agitated, I understand your concern. Once my daughter had a full care plan in place we were able to put in place a crisis prevention plan that consisted of my daughter having access to call the crisis team and therapist 24 hours a day, in addition to me and her close friends who have provided her support. It's very reassuring for all, once that is in place as we learnt in June, it worked, she was able to avoid a crisis.  Hopefully next week they will be able to share a wider care plan having considered this weeks appointment.

How are you coping yourself? Do you have support at home, friends ... .

WDx