Emotional Light Switch

[jenniferadair]

HI everyone! My husband has not been professionally diagnosed with BPD but has all the classic traits that go along with it. We are currently separated due to a conflict that escalated into physical injury. I talk to him on the phone for the most part because I cannot bring myself to see him face to face. My question is that my husband can turn his emotions on and off like a light switch. Tonight he went from crying hysterically  (to the point where I could not understand a word he was saying) to calm and loving. Is this a normal characteristic associated with BPD?

[Circle]

Hello,
Basically BPD is an emotional regulation disorder. I can fathom a person with BPD (pwBPD) having that drastic emotional switch, if it occured naturally. However, if it seemed contrived, I would guess that it was either: a. For manipulation, or b. Another cluster-b personality disorder.

Cluster B personality disorder traits:
( www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/personality-disorders/symptoms-causes/dxc-20247656 )

Welcome to bpdfamily!

[Lucky Jim]

Hey Jennifer, Welcome!  You have come to a great place.  Sure, I think those w/BPD are experts at using their emotions for manipulation.  If one approach isn't working, it's common for them to switch gears.  What makes you think your H has BPD?

LuckyJim

[amsheehy]

Hi Jennifer,

I've been involved with the quiet type and she absolutely can go from genuinely hysterical and sobbing to acting like nothing happened within a very short period of time.  It's indeed like the flip of a switch and something we've discussed on numerous occasions. 

I might be upset about something for a number of hours/days and will dwell on it, but not necessarily fall to pieces crying whereas she'll experience a sudden rush of extreme emotions and have a total breakdown, but will recover much more quickly.