"Adult" child recently diagnosed with BPD

[WANTSTORELAX]

I think I need support from people who understand. My young adult daughter was diagnosed as having BPD, after threatening suicide and being hospitalized. I had no idea and my world was rocked. I was already aware of BPD, but never saw it coming with my daughter. She'd had issues since middle school, had been in counseling, but never got in any real trouble. She has been treated for ADHD, and I'll tell you, the symptoms are quite similar. She's still in outpatient hospitalization, they've added PTSD(also almost exactly same symptoms as BPD) and an eating disorder. I am her main (read only) support and it's wearing me out. Thru her growing years, I've rescued her countless times. I'm the fixer. But I am exhausted. She may move back to live with me and my husband soon and it just stresses me out so bad. It should just be for a brief time, but who knows. I just want to relax! But I feel like I won't be able to, because she's so high maintenance emotionally.  How do y'all in similar circumstances cope? And please keep it as hopeful as possible... .Not sure I can take hopeless right now.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[drained1996]

 

Hi and welcome Wantstorelax.  We do understand your situation as many here either have or are going through exactly what you are experiencing.  To the right of this page you will see some tools and lessons that can help you in your journey.  We cannot change them, but we can change the way we react and communicate with them.  A good comprehension of the illness as well as being mindful of our own reactions/communications can go a long way in making life a little smoother. 
Is your daughter accepting of the therapy she is receiving?  Do you see a therapist yourself... .if not I suggest you do... .having a professional guide in this process who understands BPD can prove very helpful.
Most of all make sure you look out after you... .be compassionate with yourself as we all make mistakes in our journey... .and that's ok!  Keep reading and sharing... .we are here.