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Author Topic: Choosing Peace  (Read 22 times)
ChoosingPeace

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 3


« on: January 17, 2026, 10:16:52 PM »

I’m new here and appreciate everyone sharing their stories. It’s helping me have even more clarity on what I need to do. My DD hasn’t been diagnosed with BPD or NPD, but I’ve been in therapy for a few years now and it’s something that my therapist highly suspects.

Even typing this up and being here makes me scared of the reaction I would get from my DD if she ever found out. Isn’t it crazy how we can live in such fear of our own child? As I’m healing I realize more and more what an absolutely insane journey this has been.

I don’t want to live like this anymore.

I refuse to do it.

I’ve lost so much of my life because of her. I’m finally seeing that and I feel like I’m in the process of grieving not only the loss of my child, but of all the years I’ve lost trying so desperately to rescue her. My other kids lost their mom because I was so preoccupied with their sister. I’d drop everything whenever she needed me.

No more.

I’ve finally gone NC and am committed to healing and getting stronger for my family and myself. Reading your stories makes me realize even more that I’m doing the right thing.

I just wanted to say hello and thank you all for creating a space where parents like us can come to share and help one another. And I’m so sorry you’re suffering, too.
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Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
js friend
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 1240


« Reply #1 on: January 18, 2026, 06:34:51 AM »

Hi Choosing peace,


My udd is now 32yo but it started from a very early age. udd cried a lot as a baby. Always a very sensitive moody child who could literally cry all day but could never say what was actually say what was wrong. Then she began to make  up very fantastical stories and telling lies from a  very early age about people and the things she had supposedly done.

There were lots of problems with friendships groups once she started school. She was either jealous of them or accusing them of hurting her or creating some kind of drama to get them to fall out with each other. I have to add that I do believe that she was also bullied at some point which affected her self esteem quite badly. After the bullying and I changed her school she seemed to reinvent herself. She became a THE BULLY, her schoolwork suffered, became very secretive, began to rebel sneaking out at night, involvement in criminal activity and the obsession with boys leading to a teenage pregnancy. Towards me she has destroyed my personal property, stolen from me, been rude and disrespectful and physically and verbally abusive.

As you can imagine there is a lot more in between that I have left out. It has been a whirlwind for sure. Frustrated/Unfortunate (click to insert in post)

I dont think that I would have done things differently and know that I did my best. I got her therapy at quite an early age but she convinced the therapist that I was the problem. I continually tried to fix ways to fix the problems..... researching, and trying different techniques and ways to improve our r/s while udd made no effort at all and seemed to despise me the more for it.

I actually remember commenting on someones post some time ago that I never thought that I would find peace again until my own death, but with this estrangement Iam enjoying the feeling of having peace back in my life which I prayed for for years and never though that I would experience ever again.
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