So, with that in mind, who cares how she looks? Really, it is likely more mirroring and what better place to practice that skill than in a profile.
How are you feeling? Lonely? Understandable. As you say, it takes a long time and the road has many twists and turns. Hope you keep posting.
Sorry for the previous rant. I am still missing her but surviving the day-to-day. I don't expect her to change and the fact she cannot accept she has caused this is very scary. She was trying to tell the police that I was violent before when she was the aggressor on previous occasions, but never in public like she was last summer. It is absolutely frightening that someone would devalue weeks in advance and then try to get them locked up into jail. As soon as I realized she had no proper Bipolar medication, I saw the devaluation happen shortly after within a week or two! I am one day half-expecting an apology like she did before, apologizing for the nonsense she has put me through but with how much her family enables her crazy ways, it may never come again.
She has, however, returned to me in secret in the past. As far as I know, she has not remained in contact with all of her previous ex's. A husband/ex-husband is someone you cannot truly forget though... .So I expect to hear something before summer is over.
Many of my friends agree that I am one of the most relaxed people that they have ever met. It is wild to think how much BPDs can distort the truth and manipulate the authorities.
I am busy looking for a job so that keeps me going lately. I don't feel the deep disappointment and loss as much as I did even 3 months ago. I am gradually accepting that she is seriously ill and needs help that no one will give her.