I'm not confused but she was

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

So to shorten my story, I was engaged to the "girl of my dreams," she was everything I wanted and to her I was everything she wanted... .At the time? We were together for a total of a year and a few months, but then she became distant the last few months and broke up with me. Immediately went into a relationship with the next guy, it didn't workout between them, and she came back to me. Everything seemed to be good, for 3 weeks. We talked about everything as if we had never broken up. Everything felt natural. Then the 4th week she grows distant and the 5th week she tells me it's over. She broke up with me saying that she wanted to be alone to mature and grow up and figure out her life. Also that she was couldn't reciprocate the love the same way that I showed her. She also stated that she couldn't jump back into the relationship. I also know she has a thing where she has an ego and doesn't get back with exes. I was the first one supposedly that she got back with. And supposedly I was the first one she said yes to marrying. So the thing is, at the end I was painted black after trying to be friends for a few days after the breakup, told me to never contact her again, and that she was sorry she got back with me that she felt she didn't deserve my love, and to leave her alone. Within the day of the breakup after scrolling through some social media posts days after, I found out she was already talking to the next guy, he was telling her I love you and all, leaving hearts all over on different posts that was very personal. I still love her and care for her. I know I have to setup boundaries with her if she ever comes back. I'm a stubborn individual, and don't like giving up so easily. Yes this is the 2nd time she's left. I was wondering if anyone has gone to get married and stay together "forever" after something like this. I'm still gonna live my life and "do me," but I just wonder if it's ever worked out for anyone before. She as a whole, attracts me, turns me on, if you will, unlike any other woman i've ever met or talked to. Not just physically but, emotionally, spiritually, mentally, etc. My friends call me stupid and crazy for thinking this, but none of them understand what a BPD partner is like. They just classify her as crazy, or psychotic, etc. Feel free to comment about my post, your own thoughts and feelings, suggestions, advice, etc. Also, I won't contact her due to me promising her to not contact her again, I know they need constancy.


Also part of this post is me just trying to get myself to talk about it with a group of individuals that understand.

[OnceEngaged001]

So to shorten my story, I was engaged to the "girl of my dreams," she was everything I wanted and to her I was everything she wanted... .At the time? We were together for a total of a year and a few months, but then she became distant the last few months and broke up with me. Immediately went into a relationship with the next guy, it didn't workout between them, and she came back to me. Everything seemed to be good, for 3 weeks. We talked about everything as if we had never broken up. Everything felt natural. Then the 4th week she grows distant and the 5th week she tells me it's over. She broke up with me saying that she wanted to be alone to mature and grow up and figure out her life. Also that she was couldn't reciprocate the love the same way that I showed her. She also stated that she couldn't jump back into the relationship. I also know she has a thing where she has an ego and doesn't get back with exes. I was the first one supposedly that she got back with. And supposedly I was the first one she said yes to marrying. So the thing is, at the end I was painted black after trying to be friends for a few days after the breakup, told me to never contact her again, and that she was sorry she got back with me that she felt she didn't deserve my love, and to leave her alone. Within the day of the breakup after scrolling through some social media posts days after, I found out she was already talking to the next guy, he was telling her I love you and all, leaving hearts all over on different posts that was very personal. I still love her and care for her. I know I have to setup boundaries with her if she ever comes back. I'm a stubborn individual, and don't like giving up so easily. Yes this is the 2nd time she's left. I was wondering if anyone has gone to get married and stay together "forever" after something like this. I'm still gonna live my life and "do me," but I just wonder if it's ever worked out for anyone before. She as a whole, attracts me, turns me on, if you will, unlike any other woman i've ever met or talked to. Not just physically but, emotionally, spiritually, mentally, etc. My friends call me stupid and crazy for thinking this, but none of them understand what a BPD partner is like. They just classify her as crazy, or psychotic, etc. Feel free to comment about my post, your own thoughts and feelings, suggestions, advice, etc. Also, I won't contact her due to me promising her to not contact her again, I know they need constancy.


Also part of this post is me just trying to get myself to talk about it with a group of individuals that understand.

[DearHusband]

For good or for bad, xPD partners leave a mark. How do you know she had BPD BTW? Might it have been NPD?

[OnceEngaged001]

BPD because of impulsiveness in jumping into relationship with guys. No sense of self linked to jumping into relationships with guys that clearly aren't a good match for her. Meaning they do all the things she hates and despises in a partner. Always feared abandonment. Closer I got the further she got, especially after engagement. Never held a stable relationship for longer than 1 year and a couple months, for ever since she could start dating. Always had a boyfriend, never could seem to be alone. Mood swings, and on things that I believed I could talk about with my fiancee and have a normal conversation about, but would most of the time get angry and mad. She does have some traits of being a narcissist as well.