Getting very frustrated with myself and family is not helping at all

[formflier]

We teach many "tactics" on bpdfamily.  I also want you to consider your "mindset" as you interact with your hubby.

I try to have a "phrase of the month" in my head that illustrates what I'm thinking about/working on.

My current phrase is "I'm not running a popularity contest... ."

I suppose that phrase is in reaction to some warnings/threats from my wife about her or kids "not liking me". 

That phrase doesn't imply that I WILL be "mean", but it means that I will focus on doing the right thing, which may or may not be popular. 

I'm confident with my kids that I'm doing enough "deliberately good" relationship things that it will balance out places where I am unpopular or perhaps make a mistake.

For my wife:  I'm confident that I do enough good relationship things with her that any reasonable (non-disordered) adult would observe that I am an actively engaged relationship partner that is "trying to build bridges" to my wife.  I don't put too much concern in my wife's "interpretation" of my actions

Hope this helps...

FF