Diagnosis + Treatment
The Big Picture
Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde? [ Video ]
Five Dimensions of Human Personality
Think It's BPD but How Can I Know?
DSM Criteria for Personality Disorders
Treatment of BPD [ Video ]
Getting a Loved One Into Therapy
Top 50 Questions Members Ask
Home page
Forum
List of discussion groups
Making a first post
Find last post
Discussion group guidelines
Tips
Romantic relationship in or near breakup
Child (adult or adolescent) with BPD
Sibling or Parent with BPD
Boyfriend/Girlfriend with BPD
Partner or Spouse with BPD
Surviving a Failed Romantic Relationship
Tools
Wisemind
Ending conflict (3 minute lesson)
Listen with Empathy
Don't Be Invalidating
Setting boundaries
On-line CBT
Book reviews
Member workshops
About
Mission and Purpose
Website Policies
Membership Eligibility
Please Donate
July 04, 2025, 04:32:10 PM
Welcome,
Guest
. Please
login
or
register
.
1 Hour
5 Hours
1 Day
1 Week
Forever
Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins:
Kells76
,
Once Removed
,
Turkish
Senior Ambassadors:
SinisterComplex
Help!
Boards
Please Donate
Login to Post
New?--Click here to register
Experts share their discoveries
[video]
99
Could it be BPD
BPDFamily.com Production
Listening to shame
Brené Brown, PhD
What is BPD?
Blasé Aguirre, MD
What BPD recovery looks like
Documentary
BPDFamily.com
>
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
>
Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
> Topic:
As Mother's Day approaches
Pages: [
1
]
Go Down
« previous
next »
Print
Author
Topic: As Mother's Day approaches (Read 604 times)
Hopelessandlost
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 29
As Mother's Day approaches
«
on:
May 08, 2017, 09:53:39 PM »
This has to be the one day a year I dread more then any emotionally. I have five adult children, only one was lucky enough to not be suffering from moderate to severe mental health in the area of personality disorders. My three daughters are not connected to me at all at this point. My one son is a diagnoised narcissist, so he has no feeling for anyone including me.
My youngest daughter met a guy online and simply took off to the other side of North America giving up her disabilty and independence a month ago. She found someone who for the moment is giving her everything she wants... .this daughter has put me through hell and back. She was diagnoised borderline but definitely has narcissism rolled in there. She has told me many times it is her way or no way. And that she is perfect and always will get what she wants. She has also told me she doesn't understand emotions and feelings yet can play the victim to prefection... .as much as my relationship with her was very unhealthy... .I miss her but I have managed to kept no contact since she left. I am terrified of being hurt again... .
I dont know what would be worse not hearing from her at all on Mother's Day or getting a nasty letter from her calling me every name in the book. I realize if I died tomarrow only my youngest would care... .and that is painful to take. I'm not like them I feel and have emotions... .Mother's Day is painful for me... .
Logged
Our objective
is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to
learn the skills
to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
Lollypop
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 1353
Re: As Mother's Day approaches
«
Reply #1 on:
May 09, 2017, 12:43:06 AM »
Hi there hopelessandlost
In a way I wish they'd ban Mothers Day. This one has always been a hard one for me too. I could tell you to try and do something nice just for yourself, to take that deep breath and say "well, I've loved them all and I've done by best, I'll celebrate that even if nobody else will". You've got one son who is also trying to do his best and most probably knows a little of how you're feeling. I think today might be the very day you can count your blessings in him. If you can't make a fuss of yourself, you can call him and have a chat and tell him you love him.
I spend a Mother's Day in my car a few years ago and spent my entire day really sobbing. It's one I regret, I wish I'd tidied myself up, combed my hair, put some lipstick on and got myself out and about. I know I'd feel sad inside but a little of me would have felt the power of pulling myself a little more together.
My heart goes to you on this very special day. I hope you find something positive to do even if you don't feel like it, anything where you can keep busy for a couple of hours will help your state of mind.
Be gentle with yourself, take care of yourself the best way you can.
Sending you a big hug
LP
Logged
I did my best. He told me I wasn’t good enough. White
MomMae
Offline
Gender:
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 184
Re: As Mother's Day approaches
«
Reply #2 on:
May 09, 2017, 12:43:38 PM »
I understand, Hopelessandlost. I have a 20 year old BPD daughter. I, too, am dreading Mother's Day, as I am sure many on here are. Yet I feel very guilty about that as I have two other children who are very loving and I know will recognize me, so I am fortunate in that respect. For me, even harder than the actual day, will be the days that follow, when I am alone with just my thoughts. No longer playing happy for everyone else's sake. The grieving, the never ending "why, why, why?", the anger. I already went through this just a couple of weeks ago when she ignored my birthday. Which was a deliberate move on her part as birthdays, and all holidays, have always been a big deal in our family... .a big deal that my once loving daughter enjoyed very much. Now nothing seems to matter to her. She dumped our entire family like a hot potato almost a year ago for a stranger she met on the internet. She is now on the third guy since him, all met on the internet, all unsavoury drug abusers, all overlapping relationships. We hear from her only when she is having a crisis or needs something. Just being ignored on an ordinary day is bad enough (which she does all the time, not returning texts, calls, etc), but special holidays are unbearable. I never thought I'd become one of "those people" who dreads holidays. I used to love them. Never say never. It makes me so sad to think this may be our new normal.
Logged
Hopelessandlost
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Posts: 29
Re: As Mother's Day approaches
«
Reply #3 on:
May 09, 2017, 02:45:36 PM »
The support from this list helps with some of the isolation and hurt around times like these. There are many of us hurting... .like I mentioned I questioned am I better off hearing nothing on these special days or receiving some blaming angry message. Not sure which hurts more... .
The old internet dating sites... they are such as easy place for these people to hide.
Hugs my friends
Logged
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?
Pages: [
1
]
Go Up
Print
BPDFamily.com
>
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
>
Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
> Topic:
As Mother's Day approaches
« previous
next »
Jump to:
Please select a destination:
-----------------------------
Help Desk
-----------------------------
===> Open board
-----------------------------
Relationship Partner with BPD (Straight and LGBT+)
-----------------------------
=> Romantic Relationship | Bettering a Relationship or Reversing a Breakup
=> Romantic Relationship | Conflicted About Continuing, Divorcing/Custody, Co-parenting
=> Romantic Relationship | Detaching and Learning after a Failed Relationship
-----------------------------
Children, Parents, or Relatives with BPD
-----------------------------
=> Son, Daughter or Son/Daughter In-law with BPD
=> Parent, Sibling, or In-law Suffering from BPD
-----------------------------
Community Built Knowledge Base
-----------------------------
=> Library: Psychology questions and answers
=> Library: Tools and skills workshops
=> Library: Book Club, previews and discussions
=> Library: Video, audio, and pdfs
=> Library: Content to critique for possible feature articles
=> Library: BPDFamily research surveys
Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife
Loading...