Please pray for wisdom. I am driving to get my child from sister in law

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

Not really sure why kids ever need to be left in anyone's care without agreement?
With maybe the exception of a local event at school, church, playdate or an agreed upon grandparent? 

Idk tho, u got lots of kids... .

Unless you find this restrictive for where you want to leave them without asking.

[Reminds me of typical divorce parenting plans... . even in those, the parent gets first right of refusal... .so ffw woulda had to ask if you wanted kids first, before leaving with (sis as) a "babysitter."]

Cause truth is... .what state you are in is not the issue.  If sis traveled to your state, are you ok with ffw leaving for 8hrs and kids with sis?

[Sunfl0wer]

Not really sure why kids ever need to be left in anyone's care without agreement?
With maybe the exception of a local event at school, church, playdate or an agreed upon grandparent? 

Idk tho, u got lots of kids... .

Unless you find this restrictive for where you want to leave them without asking.

[Reminds me of typical divorce parenting plans... . even in those, the parent gets first right of refusal... .so ffw woulda had to ask if you wanted kids first, before leaving with (sis as) a "babysitter."]

Cause truth is... .what state you are in is not the issue.  If sis traveled to your state, are you ok with ffw leaving for 8hrs and kids with sis?

[formflier]

Nope... .any state... any where... .I'm not ok with it... with the Sis being "in charge" or "responsible for" any minor child or mine.

FF

[empath]

My experience with the whole written agreement thing is that it doesn't help with changing the behavior of our spouses... .  My h has agreed on paper to do something - the church even required him to do it for a time (with accountability and the whole bit). He tells people that he is doing it, but he isn't - and there is a lack of a paper trail.

When they have 'feels', the things that are written down don't matter.

[formflier]

https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=313215.new#new

I'm continuing this thread at the link above.


The written agreements are for "paper trail" and will be constructed so that lack of future paper trail shows "non-compliance".

For instance... perhaps any future trips are only discussed in writing... in email... with Biblical references and goals.

If our goal is to help her extended family... .why wouldn't we want to be in the right frame of mind (after reading and reflecting on appropriate Bible verses) so that we can edify them in a way that honors our faith?



Why wouldn't we want to do that?

FF

[Harley Quinn]

I am locking this thread because it has reached its length limit. The post originator is welcomed to open a continuation thread on this topic.  Have a great day.