What I learned from my BPDh this Christmas

[How to communicate after a contentious divorce...]

1. That males are allowed to be a-holes if they don't get there sexual needs taken care of and any guy would agree and is totally justified.   Behavior Justified.
2. That I am a neglectful and abusive parent because a cup is not clean to give my daughter a drink.  It is not his job to wash cups, therefore daughter does not get drink until I finish nursing the baby.  I should have thought ahead and purchased 3 packs of plastic cups instead of 2.  Shame on me.
3. I am a cold hearted Ice Queen.  Because he groped me (showing me affection in his mind) and I didn't reciprocate (have relations with him).
4. I sleep when I am awake and also snore while I am awake.  But I am not awake because he says so.  Tells me to go sleep upstairs.  Then gets mad at me when I sleep upstairs.  What?
5.  2 year old sitting on the stairs (2nd or 3rd step).  Me and my 11 year old son are near by watching, but not hovering.  BPDh comes in yelling that no one is watching her, stomping and scaring her, telling me how irresponsible I am. Whisks her off to another room, then within 5 minutes she comes wandering into the living room with... .wait for it... .NO Supervision!  Can you believe it?
6.  I eat veggies a lot.  Usually seasoned and with some butter, olive oil or bacon fat (cabbage, green beans or brussel sprouts with the bacon fat and bits of bacon).  Husband eats lots of junk food and processed foods.  Tells me I am going to die from how I eat and no wonder my kids look the way they do.
7. Gets mad at me for getting help with presents (we are working poor) because it affecting his pride pretty much.  Then is happy later because he doesn't have to spend his money.  Which means more weed and cigarettes for him.

To be continuing through out the season... .
(Sorry for my sarcasm, it's been that kind of day.)

Hope everyone had a nice holiday.

[Smileypants]

1. That males are allowed to be a-holes if they don't get there sexual needs taken care of and any guy would agree and is totally justified.   Behavior Justified.
2. That I am a neglectful and abusive parent because a cup is not clean to give my daughter a drink.  It is not his job to wash cups, therefore daughter does not get drink until I finish nursing the baby.  I should have thought ahead and purchased 3 packs of plastic cups instead of 2.  Shame on me.
3. I am a cold hearted Ice Queen.  Because he groped me (showing me affection in his mind) and I didn't reciprocate (have relations with him).
4. I sleep when I am awake and also snore while I am awake.  But I am not awake because he says so.  Tells me to go sleep upstairs.  Then gets mad at me when I sleep upstairs.  What?
5.  2 year old sitting on the stairs (2nd or 3rd step).  Me and my 11 year old son are near by watching, but not hovering.  BPDh comes in yelling that no one is watching her, stomping and scaring her, telling me how irresponsible I am. Whisks her off to another room, then within 5 minutes she comes wandering into the living room with... .wait for it... .NO Supervision!  Can you believe it?
6.  I eat veggies a lot.  Usually seasoned and with some butter, olive oil or bacon fat (cabbage, green beans or brussel sprouts with the bacon fat and bits of bacon).  Husband eats lots of junk food and processed foods.  Tells me I am going to die from how I eat and no wonder my kids look the way they do.
7. Gets mad at me for getting help with presents (we are working poor) because it affecting his pride pretty much.  Then is happy later because he doesn't have to spend his money.  Which means more weed and cigarettes for him.

To be continuing through out the season... .
(Sorry for my sarcasm, it's been that kind of day.)

Hope everyone had a nice holiday.

[SamwizeGamgee]

I'm so sorry you're going through this kind of treatment, and especially during the holidays - where we tend to be with family more time.
Remember you're not alone.  And, you're not a victim - you're a survivor.  I hope you can find some joy and peace in your own heart, and in the hearts of the kids.  

And, now I'm totally craving fried cabbage.  Thanks

[5xFive]

Smiley,
Sorry for the rough holiday. I know how you feel! Sometimes you just have to get the anger and frustration out, and we’re so lucky that we have a safe place here with bpdfamily!
I hope things have smoothed out for you and you’re in a better place.