Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
March 29, 2024, 07:45:58 AM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Kells76, Once Removed, Turkish
Senior Ambassadors: Cat Familiar, EyesUp, SinisterComplex
  Help!   Boards   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
How to communicate after a contentious divorce... Following a contentious divorce and custody battle, there are often high emotion and tensions between the parents. Research shows that constant and chronic conflict between the parents negatively impacts the children. The children sense their parents anxiety in their voice, their body language and their parents behavior. Here are some suggestions from Dean Stacer on how to avoid conflict.
84
Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: Was going to see her but she said we are just friend  (Read 400 times)
Emotions
***
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 208


« on: February 12, 2018, 12:38:33 PM »

I was going to visit my exgwBPD tomorrow. I asked her if she still loved me and wanted to be with me. Her response each time was yes I've already told you I do... .I was scheduled to leave tomorrow am. I got a text from her saying hi today. I replied I just checked in I'm excited to see you. Met with radio silence... .I asked if she still wanted me to come and her response was if you want too. I said if you want me to I am excited and would love to see her... .she said don't be complicated your my friend and I want to see my friend.  Red flag/bad  (click to insert in post) for me so I called her up. I said are you seeing someone else? She replied maybe. I said I told you I was coming down to discuss living with you and being with you and if you are seeing someone else I don't want to come. (I've previously expressed this a couple times) and each time she agreed and said I should come and that she's excited to see me. My instincts were feeling tainted about this whole visit and have finally come to fruition... .she said she would call me back, but has yet to do so... .I don't know why if I was/am feeling so tainted about this, why I can't make the healthy choice... .I would love feedback or responses, because this is going to be a difficult week detaching for the second time from her (I previously had to this past summer)
Logged

Train your mind to be calm in every situation
Like an island that no flood can overwhelm
In these times we must act like the eye of the hurricane
"It takes a nation of millions to hold us back" (public enemy)
formflier
Retired Staff
*
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 19076



WWW
« Reply #1 on: February 12, 2018, 01:10:47 PM »

 
Hey... .am I right in figuring out that this is the second time you have done this?  So far is this playing out like previous recycles?

If it is more than twice, let me know.

   

Sorry this doesn't seem to be turning out the way you would like it to. 

Has there been much "push/pull in your relationship?

FF
Logged

JoeBPD81
*****
Offline Offline

Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 709



WWW
« Reply #2 on: February 12, 2018, 03:31:20 PM »

How long were you separated?

I'm sorry to hear about this blow. I got desperated trying to get a straight response about she wanting to see me or not. It seems a really hard question for them.

As we don't get clear responses, they don't sound sincere, so we hold on to hope, and we get very confused. It is difficult to move on when you are not sure what is happening.

I can't offer answers, but I get you, and I wish you the best.
Logged

We are in this together.
pearlsw
********
Offline Offline

Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 2801


"Be kind whenever possible, it is always possible"


« Reply #3 on: February 14, 2018, 12:42:06 AM »

Hi Emotions,

Just checking in and seeing if you have an update!

Did you go ahead and decide to see her? How are you feeling?

take care, pearl.
Logged

Walk on a rainbow trail, walk on a trail of song, and all about you will be beauty. There is a way out of every dark mist, over a rainbow trail. - Navajo Song
Emotions
***
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 208


« Reply #4 on: February 17, 2018, 07:17:06 PM »

Nope... .she texted back I am seeing someone, it just started and I didn't know how to tell you, I still want you to come if you want... .are you still gonna come? I replied I wish I was coming but I'm not... .I texted her the next day, I am thankful for our friendship and I will think of her every day even if we won't talk as much... .she said she hopes I'm okay she loves me still cares about me and considers me family. The next day, v-day, I said happy Valentine's Day, she replied happy Valentine's Day. Haven't texted (or spoke since) I have been talking to family and friends for the past three days, and am trying to remember that when one door closes, another door opens... .I went through this last summer, and am remembering some of the same feelings as then. I feel more relaxed, but still wonder how she is and I do miss her honestly speaking. So I'm doing ok, it could be better emotionally, but it could also be worse... .it tiring emotionally-mentally, but I am counting my blessings and thankful for things in life that I notice these days, but managed to go by the wayside when I was focused on her... .time will tell my brothers and sisters!
Logged

Train your mind to be calm in every situation
Like an island that no flood can overwhelm
In these times we must act like the eye of the hurricane
"It takes a nation of millions to hold us back" (public enemy)
Emotions
***
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 208


« Reply #5 on: February 17, 2018, 07:19:58 PM »

We went NC from June 17' to September 17'... .I have visited her 3 times since September and I was attempting a recycle I guess... .I got my wish, and I was planning on being with her again... .she ended up seeing someone maybe the same replacement, maybe a different one... .this was the first recycle for me
Logged

Train your mind to be calm in every situation
Like an island that no flood can overwhelm
In these times we must act like the eye of the hurricane
"It takes a nation of millions to hold us back" (public enemy)
Red5
********
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Separated
Posts: 1661


« Reply #6 on: February 17, 2018, 09:39:28 PM »

Emotions,

I have to tell you, TRUST you’re instinct or what is called your “gut”.

It will never let you down !

Red5
Logged

“We are so used to our own history, we do not see it as remarkable or out of the ordinary, whereas others might see it as horrendous. Further, we tend to minimize that which we feel shameful about.” {Quote} Patrick J. Carnes / author,
Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2024?

Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2023 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
12years
alterK
AskingWhy
At Bay
Cat Familiar
CoherentMoose
drained1996
EZEarache
Flora and Fauna
ForeverDad
Gemsforeyes
Goldcrest
Harri
healthfreedom4s
hope2727
khibomsis
Lemon Squeezy
Memorial Donation (4)
Methos
Methuen
Mommydoc
Mutt
P.F.Change
Penumbra66
Red22
Rev
SamwizeGamgee
Skip
Swimmy55
Tartan Pants
Turkish
whirlpoollife



Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!