Length of Separation and Age of Youngest

[MeandThee29]

I realize this isn't a substitute for legal advice, but I'm trying to get a ballpark idea before I shell out funds. He wants to file for divorce ASAP.

We have been separated for 8 months, both living in separate states although he didn't become a resident of his current state until 5 months ago.

My state requires a 6 month separation if you have no minors or a 12 month separation if you do. The problem is that our youngest was no longer a minor four months into the separation.

If he files in my state (only one has to be a resident), I'm guessing that the 6-month clock started at our youngest's birthday, which would mean that he can't file until June.

Or if he files in his state under one path, no separation is required if there are no minors, but he must be a 6-month resident, which would mean that he can't file until late May.

Am I missing anything? I'm concerned about this because my finances are tight.

[MeandThee29]

I just remembered something. We had a brief fling during separation. In my state, if you have sex during the separation, the clock starts over! So my youngest becoming an adult doesn't matter at all.

I'm guessing that he will file in his state under the expedited procedure, which means May. Oh my.

[ForeverDad]

There is code that mandates uniformity across states for certain aspects of divorce.  One is that if there are minors then the person filing has to be a resident of that state for at least six months.  That six month requirement is so a person can't move away and immediately file there forcing the spouse who stayed to go to that other state for the divorce and custody process.

Since your youngest is now an adult that doesn't apply.  The framework would have to be what his new state has as the rules for filing divorce.  Better to find out sooner than later what the gotchas are.  A lawyer ought to be able to advise you whether your state or his state would be more favorable in a divorce.  Is either state a community property state?  If the marriage has assets (money, house, etc) you may want a divorce in that state, I think.  Get consultations with multiple lawyers (1) to ensure you get a consistent response and (2) you get a sense of which lawyer has better and more practical time-tested strategies.

While only eight states observe community property laws, there's still a good chance this affects you. That's because 25% of the American population lives in one of these community property states. So perk up your ears if you're a resident of Arizona, California, Idaho, Nevada, New Mexico, Texas, Louisiana, Wisconsin or Washington.

Community property touches everything from personal property ownership to debt to divorce and inheritance... .