He triangulated with his ex wife.

[Calmcollected]

I received a nasty text from his ex wife that if I don’t stop speaking about her kids
Charges will be laid. Her son assaulted me, I called the Police but did not lay charges. This all happened in January. I told someone who I thought was a “friend” about what I was going through and she showed him the messages. He majorly disregulated yesterday. His ex wife is an alcoholic and prescription drug user. I messaged her back, put her in her place. And when she called I blocked her. I forwarded the messages to my as of tonight exBPDbf. He mistakingly thought she had sent them to him. Hes not the best with technology. He told her “the best way to hurt her is to leave bad reviews on her company page.” He’s referring to my business Facebook page, the business that has supported and launched his business. The business that provided groceries for him and his kids for two years. The business that paid for all the renovations on his house.
I run his contracting business. I do all his quotes and invoicing, I run his Facebook page and his email account. I do the advertising etc. The vehicles are in my name, and I had signed them over to him in February. He has not registered them or taken the plates off. He currently has a suspended licence. In the morning I am sending him this. “Your Facebook page is paused, the email has a message redirecting them to your
phone number. The Kijiji ads are deleted. I disabled the reviews on my Facebook page so she can’t harm my business. I've blocked all your staff on my phone. You can explain this to them. I signed the trucks over to you in February, you still have not given me the plates. I’m going to service Canada in the AM to report the trucks sold and the plates as missing.
“Failure to transfer the vehicle within six days is an offence under the Highway Traffic Act.”
Driving those trucks without a licence or insurance is illegal. This time you will go to jail. You have no one to blame but yourself. I’ve given you plenty of time.“
As of today, I was trying, he was giving me the silent treatment and I was using SET. I can believe that he is conspiring with a woman he hates, who is the reason he has no licence, giving her my phone number. His business will last 2 weeks and it will be gone. He is incapable of running it. He lives 20 minutes out of the city and can not operate a contracting company without a truck.
I had empathy and sympathy for so long, but the speed and visciousness with which he turned on me is breath taking. I do not know this man.

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[NGU]

Hi Calmcollected.

I read this post and your first one from January. You've had quite a frustrating year so far.

It sounds like he has pushed you away, and his business.

You called him your as-of-tonight exBPDbf, and mentioned sending him that email in the morning. Was your plan to break up with him last night and then send that email this morning? If that's the case, can you give us an update?

Thanks,
-ngu

[Calmcollected]

So I initially didn't. I sent this instead.
I'm still here, I haven't left. You're hurt and angry that I talked to "former crazy friend" about us from the night we met, until now. You feel betrayed and you want to hurt me like I hurt you. You did when you told "your ex wife" to damage my business.
Now you have to decide where we go from here. We move forward and work on things and begin our life together or both move on. I'd like to work on things, but I respect the decision you make. I'm about to get my divorce settlement. I picked up the house appraisal on monday. Do we begin a new life together or do I move on without you?"
I sent that in the morning, no response. At 1pm I sent him a message regarding an email that I had forwarded and this means taking a screen shot and sending it to him because he is notable to do things technology wise except for his phone. No response.
In the evening, I sent this.
"I'm guessing by your lack of response this means no to talking and yes to me stopping work for "construction name" Your facebook page is paused, the email has a message redirecting them to your phone number. The Kijiji ads are paused. I disabled the reviews on my facebook page so she can't harm my business. I signed the trucks over to you in February, you still have not given me the plates. I'm going to "plate office" in the am to report the trucks sold and the plates as missing. "failure to transfer the vehicle within six days is an offence under the highway traffic act" Driving those vehicles without a licence or insurance is illegal.
His response which I knew was going to happen immediately and it did
"You rat me out, ok, now its on.
Me "I don't want to. If you want to talk to me, I'm willing to sit down, but I'm not dealing with the drama anymore"
Him "you just did"
Me "If you need a week to have some space, I'm fine with that, but not knowing what's going on or waht to say to your client is not something I can do anymore. Do you need a week to calm down before you speak to me?"
Me "I still love you, I know you're angry, but I'm getting my settlement, I need to plan my life. I'd like it with you, but if its not, we need to come up with a plan for what you're going to do, so I can figure out what I'm going to do. If you talk to me, I'm fine. It's when you give me the silent treatment that I don't know what to do."
This was yesterday and no other comments.
I sent him 4 texts afterwards with messages from clients and his accountant.
This morning I sent him this.
Me"I'm not going to service Canada The business facebook page is up and I'm still receiving your emails. I just can't answer them because you're not telling me what to say. "Client" wants to know a start date for "job" I don't have a lot of time for your stuff anymore because my orders have gone up with my new website. I can't chase after you anymore. You have to help me get this stuff done or you will lose business. You got the plans for that house on "Street name" on April 4th and you have done a quote. It's over 3 weeks. "street name" has been 2 weeks. I have following up on the $30,000 job because it's been so volatile and I don't want to offer a service and you're not around. We can't operate like this. Let me know what you want to do."
Him "Then I'll take over the page"
Me "Ok, I love you, I want to help, but without communication it's really hard"
He has never offered to take it over before I've tried, but he blocked me on facebook a long time ago, so I couldn't transfer it. I have given him the web address and passwords for everything else, but he won't do them.
Then his feeling finally came out and he addressed them.
Him "all you do is lie and trash me and my family to EVERYONE... .that you talk to. I know what you been saying and to who. I gave you a chance to tell me the truth and you refused.
Me " I do love you and have always been there for you. You feel lied to, that the person who has your back doesn't and that I don't really care. I'm guilty of making you feel that way. It was a longer conversation than just at the side of the road. She was a person I thought was a friend, someone I told everything to, starting with the first night you kissed me. She would call me to go out for wings to find out about my life. She was someone I could vent to when I was upset. I trusted the wrong person. I didnt' know until tuesday when I talked to her sister that she's a drug addict, ran through $400,000 in less than a year on drugs. I know her kids too and they are really great, they live with her sister because she caused trouble and tries to run their lives too"
Him "who the hell are you talking about... .I've heard and got it from more than one person... .you swore you wouldn't trash my kids anymore and you flat out lied. I gave you the chance to tell the truth.
Me "Former friend" is the woman from Monday.
Him "avoid the problem like always"
Me "I'd like to sit down and listen to what you have to say, you're important to me"
Him "I've already told you many times its obviously a waste of time"
Me "It's never a waste of time when you love someone"
Him "you're still as 2 faced as you were 2 years ago... .I'd never trust you again. This is where you threaten me"
Me" I do love you and I'm sorry"
Him "then mucking admit it"
Me "I talked to people that I thought were friends and told them things that were happening in my life. I'm sorry. I trust everyone and I shouldn't"
Him "that what I thought... .bye... .text me the info on the fb page then lose my number"
Him "you still trashed my kids"
Me "I did, but I also tell the the good things"
Him "enough chances, I want you to admit it"
Me "can we meet at "coffee shop" so we can do this face to face? I don't care if it's a parking lot"
Him "forget it   I'm done   Bye"
Him "send me the info then it's done"
Him "in the future... .be careful who you talk to"
Me "I'd like to apologize and make amends"
Me explaining how you cant tranfer a business facebook account without being friends
Me "You're happiness is important to me. I'm truly sorry that I'm the cause of all this pain. I'm going to stop talking to people about us when I'm upset."
Him "text it to me"
Me "I can't you have to re ad me as a friend"
Him "more lies   nice"
I send him a screen shot from facebook explaining how its done. It says or like the page.
Him "or have liked your page    I can read"
Me "yes but then you blocke me, you complain you can't even read your own business page
Him "whatever... .Muck it"
Me "I'm sorry for what I've done. I like doing the admin stuff for the business because I love you and we're building a life together. When you're ready I'd like to sit down and hear what you have to say, you matter to me"
After that, no response. He once told me with his son when he was bad, he liked to let him "stew a bit" before he would talk to him because it generally made him sweat and worry about the punishment. I can see that he does it with me. When I do get a response from him like this, it means he's coming out of his dysregulation a bit. Last time it took a clients wife telling him her husband had asked me out to get contact. That took about 3 weeks. The jealousy came out and I was accused of sleeping with him. I had stopped contact all together and went on dates with other men.
Sorry for the length, but this is what happened. It would be interesting to see if other people have experiences with being called a liar. I get called that when I say I love him too.
Then I sent him a screen shot from facebook

[Calmcollected]

In case you are lost with part two. A "friend" of mine that I've known for ten years and as recently as this week, I found out she has lost her nursing licence for stealing percocets from patients, her house burned down last year and she has burned through $400,000 on coke and heroin, her children are estranged and she is now on disability and living with her parents at the age of 50. I have told her everything we have been going through for the last three years. Her sister who I have been friends with for 20 years told me that she is mentally ill, toxic and no one wants to be around her, including her elderly mother who lives with her. She thrives on drama and discord. She met with my BPD on monday for a quote for her parents, told him I bad mouthed him and his kids, sent him messages I had conversations with her about our troubles. He in turn I believe sent them to his ex wife. This "friend on Monday afternoon after meeting with him blocked me on facebook. I spoke to her sister and she said she is not shocked. She has her sisters children living with her and when she was thinking of trying to reconcile,  her own children told their aunt not to bother as she is toxic and won't change.