Shortly after we married he became a different person

[cynderlady]

Hello,
I want to learn more about BPD and NPD. I have searched a long time for someone or a group where I can find answers and guidance. I have been trying to make sense of the life I now have for many years. I met, fell in love with a wonderful man and married him. Shortly after we married he became a different person, distant, unloving, difficult and more. I didn't understand and keep trying to find a link to the man I met and fell in love with. Years later I am still looking. Why did I stay? I stayed because I loved him and thought the man I met would emerge.
It is all very confusing so this is all I have at the moment.
I also think with what I have been through and as I learn here in the long run maybe I will be able to help someone else who is going down a similar path.
Thanks,
Cynderlady

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[juju2]

Hi,

 

You are in the right place.  There is a lot of experience here.  Healing, help are here.

How long have you been married.  Is your spouse diagnosed, you can share as much as you feel comfortable sharing.

This is a safe place.

j

[Struggler123]

Hello,
I want to learn more about BPD and NPD. I have searched a long time for someone or a group where I can find answers and guidance. I have been trying to make sense of the life I now have for many years. I met, fell in love with a wonderful man and married him. Shortly after we married he became a different person, distant, unloving, difficult and more. I didn't understand and keep trying to find a link to the man I met and fell in love with. Years later I am still looking. Why did I stay? I stayed because I loved him and thought the man I met would emerge.
It is all very confusing so this is all I have at the moment.
I also think with what I have been through and as I learn here in the long run maybe I will be able to help someone else who is going down a similar path.
Thanks,
Cynderlady

Welcome to the forum.

There are numerous guides here.

I wrote this one guide

https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=324260.0

It can better help you understand, some of the everyday situations you are facing.

Heal yourself, but never explain yourself.

[cynderlady]

Hi JuJu,

[Tattered Heart]

Hi cynderlady,

Welcome

I'm sorry to hear that things have been difficult for you. Can you share a little more about what has been going on in your relationship?