New here: Son just diagnosed after suicide attempt, what do we do?

[Mom1212]

My son was just hospitalized after a suicide attempt. Doctors think he may have BPD?  
He is angry with us that we brought him to the hospital. We are trying to navigate through all the mixed emotions?  
What do we do?

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Kwamina]

Hi Mom1212

I am verry sorry you are going through this with your son. It is very sad that some people with disorders such as BPD have suicidal tendencies and in some cases make actual suicide attempts. I can imagine how tough this must also be for you as his parent.

Before this happened, were you already aware that your son struggled with suicidal tendencies? Was this his first suicide attempt?

I think you did the right thing taking him to the hospital, it's important that he gets professional help for his issues.

His doctors think he might have BPD, have they perhaps suggested a treatment plan?

What do we do?

As you get started here, I suggest you take a look at the tools and lessons in the right-hand side margin of this board. These resources can help you communicate with your son and also help you stay more calm as you deal with these challenging situations.

Take care

[Merlot]

Hi Mom1212

I hope you are ok . This really is a worst nightmare scenario. We love our children it must be so gut wrenching to wonder what led your son to attempt suicide.  

I'm glad you came to the bpdfamily.  There are many parents here who have or are experiencing very similar circumstances. Firstly, daealing with the crisis/diagnosis and then navigating unchartered territory in learning about BPD.

Just know that for whatever reasons your son is angry, this is not your fault. He may be angry for sometime as our BPD children struggle to regulate and manage their emotions. Just being present and calm, even in the face of adversity will help to stabilize his emotions... .maybe not all at once but he will slowly respond.  As hard as this is for you, take yourself away when you have 5 minutes and think about what support you need too as this vital in also being able to care for your son.

Please keep coming and sharing. There is a lot of support from parents here who have trodden your journey and who will be invaluable in providing you golden moments of their collective wisdom.

Take care and be kind to yourself, this is very challenging for you and we are here anytime you need an ear.

Merlot

[wendydarling]

Hi Mom1212  

I join Kwanima and Merlot welcoming you here. It is a parents worst nightmare as Merlot says. I've been where you are with my then 26yr daughter 3 years ago, attempt followed by diagnosis.

We're here for you when you have time, this forum and the parents here helped pull me through.

You are not alone  

WDx  

[Panda39]

Hi Mom1212,

I read the title of your post and thought... .Take a deep breath   

There is a lot going on and it's all scary and you want to fix things and do what is best for your son.  But take a minute to breath, maybe think about questions you have for the doctors and write a list.  Carry it around with you and add to it as things come up, get answers and take notes. Everything going on right now is very overwhelming so keeping notes you can reflect on and discuss with your family later might be helpful.

When things slow down, I hope you will come back and visit here there is a lot of information, tools, and support to be found here.

I wanted to suggest a couple of books that you might want to check out later that I found really good in terms of learning about BPD... .

Stop Walking on Eggshells: Taking Your Life Back When Someone You Care About Has Borderline Personality Disorder by Randi Kreger
 
and

Overcoming Borderline Personality Disorder: A Family Guide for Healing and Change by Valerie Porr M. A.

Thinking of you, your son and family 

Panda39