Timing..,who’s on first and where?

[Dignity&Strength]

Goodness, you guys are on top of things! Thank you!

So MOSAIC is highly reputable! That’s both encouraging and stomach churning, as my score was a 9 out of 10. Quality score was 183 out of a possible
200. I spent from lunch to supper on it today.

Fear... .there’s a lot about not giving in to it, especially in Christian radio these days, but I agree, Turkish, it is a gift. But it feels like 8 shots of espresso and digestive upset. It is no fun. My body has been stuck in this fearful fight of flight mode for many years now.

I’ll add it to my kindle ASAP.

I do not still have the package, but I took lots of pictures, looked up false names and made the personal connection between the false names and who sent it. I also have emails with Jose attachments to my local domestic violence detective, who is “keeping it all on file for me”.  (But nothing is done? Sigh) I suppose that’s because he knows how securely and for what reason I’m protecting S5.
Thanks everyone. I am staying ahead of this curve because of you all.
Dig

[Turkish]

It's an easy read (short).  Let me know what you think and keep us updated. 

[Radcliff]

Dig,

9 out of 10 is impressive.  I've only heard from a handful of people here who've taken it, but that's the first time I've heard of a 9.  That would explain the indigestion.  I am so sorry you're living with that level of pressure.  You had a great idea in your earlier reply about documenting the MOSAIC test and giving it to your lawyer.  At least I think you said that.

You mentioned getting a psychiatric assessment.  I'm thinking you want an assessment by a psychologist, MFT, or LCSW who is an expert in domestic violence.  Only a small percentage of therapists actually understand domestic violence.  If you end up in front of the wrong guy, you might find someone who says it's all a part of the "family system" or it's all you.  Your lawyer may know someone, or a lawyer in the next larger city.  When you're interviewing candidates, ask them to explain Erik Stark's work on coercive control

WW

[Dignity&Strength]

Ah ha!

These last resources have provided and excellent framework to describe this situation.
I found a good Stark video explaining coercive control. That, put together with the power and control wheel explains nearly exactly what’s happening, to me.

The gift of fear book gave me a huge ah ha moment! I’ve been trying to describe the actual most escalated incidents, but left out the context of the behaviors before and leading up to it. I thought brevity and efficiency were most important. While it’s important not to be wordy, the CONTEXT is everything. No context equals, “so what, big deal, he took your son up a tree... .what’s your problem?”

Back to my documentation, gotta tweak and work on it some more!
Excellent resources gang! Thanks SO SO much!

Dig

[Radcliff]

Dig,

You make a fantastic point about context!  As I've mentioned, I took my journals and boiled them down to summaries with 3-4 line bullet points describing each incident and the date, and grouped the bullet points under different headings for each tactic or type of abuse.  This was very useful to show the totality of what was going on, and along with a few key assault videos has been the main way I've told my story.  But after relying on the bullet points and leaving the journals idle for a while, I went back to them to cut and paste the journal days that described the videos, to give them context.  I was shocked at how much difference context made.  To see a few of the worst days, when there were a dozen incidents in a day using six different tactics, is truly stunning.  Eyes glaze over after a while at the summaries, but the humanity in the journal day entries is impossible to ignore.  I'm thinking the best combo may be summaries combined with a few of the most important journal days.  So the reader really understands that all of those bullet points is part of a continuing awful story.

WW


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