I'm New, my DD has not spoken to me in 3 months, how can I get my DD back

[bhappy2day]

Hello, I'm so glad I found this sight. My 17 year old daughter exhibits many of the BPD traits and behaviors. She is verbally abusive and downright mean. She used to be a great student. Now she hates school. She lives with her father (nearby) and I have a good relationship with him. She takes zero responsibility for her actions. She is in therapy, but things are no better. Now she's decided that I am her enemy. She hasn't spoken to me in 3 months. She won't answer my texts or phone calls. She tells me she doesn't want me in her life. I am heart broken. I love my daughter very much, but I feel helpless. I have two adult sons and we have a great relationship. How can I get my daughter back?

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Feeling Better]

Hello bhappy2day

I would like to welcome you here and to also say how sorry I am for what brought you here 

I am so sorry to hear that your daughter hasn’t spoken to you in three months, I know full well how heartbreaking that can be, my uBPD son went NC (no contact) with me over eighteen months ago. I have tried to regain contact with him but like your daughter, he doesn’t reply to any of my emails. May I ask, was there anything that happened that led to your daughter not wanting you in her life? You say that you have a good relationship with her father, who lives close by, are you able to talk to him about your daughter and why she has turned her back on you?

I hope to hear more from you bhappy2day x 

[Susmarie]

I am new here too.  I have a son who shows all the traits and therapy has not helped and he has also gone no contact on me.  He just left the home to live wwith his fahter who is a diagnosed BPD and needless to say things have gotten even worse.  I just wanted to say you are not alone in your experience; it is heartbreaking.  I hope you keep reaching out and taking care of yourself too.