Bad day

[FaithHopeLove]

Today was a bad day. DS24 wBPD lost his ID card in his apartment. His paranoia got the best of him so he decided someone stole it so he texted all his friends to say f you. Then my husband found it in the trash so DS decided he was the one who stole it and was just "covering his tracks." Also DS says he took 13 percosets because he was trying to suicide so I told DH to call 911 and take him to the hospital. DH called me from the ambulance. In the background I heard him tell DS that he was going to the hospital because "mom got upset" as if I was the problem not the 13 percosets. As if that wasn't enough DH discovered a rifle in DSs apartment that DH cosigned the lease on with a defaced serial number. I am so over this. I still love my son but I no longer like him. I am not thrilled with my enabling husband either.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Only Human]

What a day, FHLKC! I can see why you'd be feeling upset with your DH and I can relate to loving, but not liking, our adult children. These relationships really take a lot out of us, don't they?

How did yesterday go? Was DS hospitalized? How are you coping today?

~ OH

[FaithHopeLove]

Thanks for you support, OH. I am doing better today. I have an appointment with my therapist in a couple of hours that will help me stay balanced as I know I must.  DS refused to admit to the doctors that he was suicidal so they released him. I don't know if he pulled that stunt "for attention" as the psych nurse suggested or what. He probably did take a bunch of pills to self medicate. Today he is moving. DH rented a U Haul and a couple of his friends are helping. I hope the move goes well. I have told DH that once it is over I strongly suggest he stop "helping" so much and let DS deal with the consequences of his own choices without being rescued. I still feel like the only one in the family with boundaries but I also have hope that too can change.

[Only Human]

I'm glad you're doing better today and that you have an appointment with your T. I know how hard it is to stand back, keep our boundaries, but you're doing it and I hope your DH will follow in your footsteps. How did he respond when you suggested he step back after the move?

~ OH

[FaithHopeLove]

He said he knows I am right and he is working on it.

[Only Human]

He said he knows I am right and he is working on it.

 

You are leading the way for your family, Faith. Keep it up!

~ OH

[FaithHopeLove]

thank you OH. You are always so helpful and affirming.