BPD DD BIRTHDAY

[smilepretty]

Could use a vent...was my DD19th birthday yesterday.  She is away at college.  17th birthday was spent in a psych ward, 18th birthday at theraputic boarding school so I was trying to make this one fun.  Her bf took her out for brunch sunday bc they couldn't celebrate last night. Instagram and FB were down so she didn't get any birthday "posts".  I sent a huge package with some presents, goodies, cards, all wrapped and shipped to arrive in time. She like that but said she wants to return some of the clothes.  Then I ordered a cupcakes and balloons from a local bakery to be hand delivered.  I tried so hard to make it special and fun from 700 miles away.  Cupcakes were to be delivered at 5pm. I told her to expect a call from the delivery person.  She said they can leave it at the mail center and she would get it at 9:30-10.  At 11pm she texted me saying how amazing it was that her BF got her EXACTLY what she told him to buy her and that they were so happy to be celebrating with krispy kreme donuts.  No mention of the cupcakes and balloons  I sent.  No thank you, no acknowledgement.  Pretty sure the mail room enjoyed a lovely midnight treat curtesy of my kid.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[mggt]

Try and not to take it personally   I know thats very hard to do.. Our children with bp
seem to only think of themselves most of the time  That has been our experience with our d   Your a good MOM

[wendydarling]

Hi smilepretty 

I'd be upset too. Why do you think she acted so ungratefully? Is this typical? Did she know the delivery was cake?

WDx

[smilepretty]

She's ungrateful because she can't see anything clearly.  She wanted a car for her 19th birthday so anything else I did would pale in comparison. I try not to take it personally but it f**ks with my head, feels so hurtful to be unappreciated.  Only made worse today bc she was again ungrateful about the gift my sisters gave her, which was generous and kind but she wanted more.. More than my sisters and i spend on each others kids, more than we spend on anything.  She is so entitled ...and told me I was the problem because I didn't communicate to my sisters properly what she wanted (a fancy wallet).   Any else ever get a case of the F**K IT'S?  Like f-this, im not trying so hard to make her happy when I keep getting yelled out. I need a break.

[FaithHopeLove]

 I get the "fek its" sometimes too. In fact I think it is healthy. It helps me to step back from situations I can't control. You are definitely not alone.