Mod note: This is a continuation of Part 1 located here: https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=338902.0Hello everyone!
Just dropping in to ask others out there how they would take this. I am bouncing this off of others because I do realize I am a worrier and sometimes tend to ruminate too much about things (already discussed many times in my threads).
A month or so ago, my son had our grandson on Friday night (him and his ex-uBPD alternate this day of the week), so it was his turn. GS3 began acting ill and crying and started running a temperature. He kept checking it off and on and when it reached 101 degrees decided to take him to Urgent Care by his home, but they were closed. He returned home and continued to keep a watch on his temperature and it ended up climbing to 102.4, which at this point he called the doctor's exchange and he explained to the doc on call what his temp was in which he was instructed to take him to the ER at their nearest hospital. He did this and GS3 ended up having Strep throat and was given the proper medicine/prescription. By the next day he was on his way to recovery. She happened to be out of town for the weekend so he also had him on Saturday, which is usually her day.
GS3 is covered by my son's insurance through his work. There are, however, deductibles to pay, so an over $1000.00 ER bill left a balance of $400.00 which he and his ex-BPD had agreed they would split any medical costs that should come up with GS3.
The bill balance just recently came in and she was so, so angry at him. She told him, "Look, you need to stop taking him to the emergency room! I can't afford half of this bill!"
He explained to her that if it was not after hours, he would have just gone to the doctor, but since it was Friday night, he first tried the Urgent Care, which would have been a lot cheaper, but it was closed. He said he was not going to allow his son's temperature to just continue to rise to a dangerous level without calling the doctor and he followed the doctor's advice, which was to take him to the ER. With this, she just shook her head, said that was ridiculous, and he needed to stop going to the ER with him.
I realize I should not try to make sense out of what she said and I believe my son acted appropriately. She refuses to split the bill and walked away acting like my son was really at fault here.
Seeing that they are going to file papers some time soon (I hope) for 50/50 custody, this attitude toward GS3's health/illnesses is a bit scary. I can't help worrying about the days she is in her care and what action will she take or not take?
It's these types of things that make me realize how money really talks! Without a ton of money, it would be nearly impossible to bring her behavior to the attention of the court system. It would be so hard to prove, and I keep referring her to as u-BPD because I don't know if she has ever been diagnosed. How in the world would you ever prove this and her inappropriate actions/behaviors towards her children? This is what this whole thread was originally about. If you don't have the money, I guess you're just stuck worrying all the time and taking chances with her child and his welfare?