so much rejection

[Ladysady]

I have a 30 year old daughter. All behaviors point to BPD. Her husband left about a month ago (for the 6th time) leaving her pregnant with 3 other children under the age of 3. She sends me dozens of texts about how she is worthless, how can she get him to come back and how I should move on and leave her alone. 

I try to validate her feelings, but it is getting more and more difficult. She finds ways to manipulate me and tries to make me feel guilty for finding ways to help her pay the rent, feed the kids,etc. If it was her alone, I think I could just let her make unwise choices all the time, but I worry for the kids.

Any advice? I don't know when to reach and when to give her space.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[FaithHopeLove]

Hello Ladysady
Welcome to the group.
I am glad you are here. A lot of members are grandparents and feel the same dilemma about how to relate to their BPD children while looking out for their grandchildren. I am sure some will be around shortly to share their experience and insights.

How does your daughter make you feel guilty?

[wendydarling]

Welcome Ladysady  

I join Faith, I too am glad you've joined us and reached out for support, though so sorry what brings you here, you are not alone.  

All behaviors point to BPD

Do you think she has any insight of her struggles? She says she feels worthless...

You are in the right place to talk, work this through with us.

Where is her H?

We are walking with you.

WDx  

[DadFromFlorida]

I don't have a lot of answers for you, but I do want you to know that you are not alone.  Sometimes it helps to know that others are facing the same struggles and we hope to learn from each other.