Mindset for accepting and wanting the care and support and medical help needed

[JAquinn]

New here,  our soon to be 20 year old son has recently been diagnosed with BDP, along with his past diagnosis of depression. this along with maladaptive behavior he has been recommended for a residential program.  we were in an IOP for DBT family recovery for the past 12 weeks.
Since refusing this recommendation and continuing drug use, he was asked to leave grandmas house, where he was living for the past 6 months.  There is a lot more detail I can add, but I am struggling if our son with ever get to the mindset that he wants help or if this even possible with BPD.  Do we rally and do an 'intervention'...or do we continue to just sit back, worry and wait for rock bottom.   
Insight?  Advice is appreciated

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[FaithHopeLove]

Hello JA and welcome to the group. Many of us here can relate to what you are going through. This is a great place to get information and support. According to what I have read interventions do not work well with people who have BPD. A better approach may be to work on boundaries and communications skills. You will find a lot of info here starting with the articles highlighted at the top of this page. Don't lose hope. Things can get better.

New here,  our soon to be 20 year old son has recently been diagnosed with BDP, along with his past diagnosis of depression. this along with maladaptive behavior he has been recommended for a residential program.  we were in an IOP for DBT family recovery for the past 12 weeks.
Since refusing this recommendation and continuing drug use, he was asked to leave grandmas house, where he was living for the past 6 months.  There is a lot more detail I can add, but I am struggling if our son with ever get to the mindset that he wants help or if this even possible with BPD.  Do we rally and do an 'intervention'...or do we continue to just sit back, worry and wait for rock bottom.   
Insight?  Advice is appreciated

[Done-er Stepdad]

If we change the sex, I could have written your letter, word for word, down to the Grandma disaster.

It is very hard for a BPD person, who already feels constantly under siege and persecuted, to even accept that they have a BPD problem at all.

My own relative has decided to split the difference and admit to having BPD "tendencies" -that come and go, like hay fever. This evolution took 4 years, including thousands of dollars of therapy with a BPD specialist. She now uses BPD as an excuse to be abusive; that she's having "a touch" of BPD on a given day.

Adding drug use into the mix (same/same for me) is yet another barrier to the kind of introspection needed for your son to move forward/mature.