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[Sukie38]

I think my son has had BPD issues for a long time, possibly almost 20 years and neither of us knowing this.  It is hard to see him so unhappy and miserable and struggling with relationships and jobs.  He says he just wants me to listen to him, so I do.  And if I say something that he doesn't like, he gets upset. 

He is blaming me for everything, not his father, not anyone else.  He has anger issues and has told me even if he was dead he probably would not be happy.  He has mentioned he wanted to die and does not believe in medication - it numbs everything, he said.  It has been difficult for the whole family to see him not fit in with us or want to be with us because of his issues and how he is feeling.

He has gone from one job to another and I think he has severe burnout as a senior software engineer.  He complains about his job on a regular basis.  I worry about him day and night.  He has gotten to counselors over the years but nothing sticks.  He said he saw one this week, but hasn't talked about it.  I love my son and I want him well, please let me know if others of you have gone through a similar time with your son or daughter and if they got help and the difference it made in your lives.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Swimmy55]

Welcome !
We are here with you and know . Does your son live with you?  This link may be of help:https://bpdfamily.com/message_board/index.php?topic=144560.0
Meanwhile it is important for you to know you are obliged to take care of yourself first.  You are as important as your son. 
Seeing our BPD kids struggling is heart breaking ..
Please have a look around this site.  When you have time , read some of the members posts and check mine out by clicking onto my name.  Please post back as you are able.