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Author Topic: Son who is 23 has BPD, also substance abuse & eating disorder  (Read 382 times)
Kuts
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Living in the same house
Posts: 1


« on: July 06, 2020, 07:34:33 PM »

Our son (23 years old) was in Rehab for 30 days for substance abuse and the therapist told us that he has BPD.
Now that he is back home with us, my wife and I need some tools to help him and us with BPD. He has been home for 4 days now and he seems to be better. Also, we have heard the DBT is the best therapy for BPD. How do we encourage our son to get some counseling help? Any tips of good DBT therapists in Northern California? Now that it is online, probably does not matter where the therapist is though. Thank you.
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Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
Modesty68

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Mother
Posts: 33


« Reply #1 on: July 08, 2020, 05:09:20 AM »

Hello!
I don't know any DBT-specialists in California, writing from Norway :-) My d 20 has BPD and eating dissorders as well (and some other stuff). In Norway the approach to BPD seems to be: DBT is mostely used to "fix" self-harming and suicidal ideations. MBT (mentalization based therapy) are mostly used to approach the interpersonal problems that BPDs so often suffer from. The best clinic for eating disorders here, are also using MBT, because the think that the one thing alle people with eating disorders have in common is that they feel unsafe/insecure.
DBT is a lot about learning skills. I think one need to be motivated to start. I hope your son are! If not, maybe he should start just by seeing someone that can give him hope, and tell him that these things are possible to work through and that he will be well and safe and that it is possible to get help. I think these things are really important. If you fund him a DPT-therapist, and even if he is backing down, I think somethings are acchieved. There are lot of stories of young people coming back to this types of work-therapy after some time. I would also recommend Valerie Porr's book Overcoming Borderline Personality Disorder. Best of luck!
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Naughty Nibbler
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Who in your life has "personality" issues: Sibling
Posts: 1727



« Reply #2 on: July 08, 2020, 04:34:03 PM »

Hi Kuts - Welcome!:
I'm sorry about the problems you are having with your son.  What is the nature of his eating disorder ? (anorexia, bulimia or overeating).  Insurance might have some bearing on who you use for DBT therapy.  The two sources below can help advise you of some possible DBT therapists in your area:

DBT LINEHAN - FIND A CLINICIAN:
https://dbt-lbc.org/index.php?page=101163

PSYCHOLOGY TODAY - FIND A PSYCHOLOGIST
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/therapists

I'm about to give you a lot of information.  My suggestion is that you start a "DBT Folder" for your favorite browser & bookmark the links I'm about to give you.  It will make it easier for you in the long run.


The additional sources below could be helpful.

EATING DISORDER:

I discovered Therapist, Andrea Wachter, from an audio course of her's that was featured on the app, InsightTimer. That lead me to check out her website & explore other things she had to offer.

Firstly, I highly recommend the app "InsightTimer" (available in both Android & Apple).  It has lots of options for various types of meditation & destressing.  The basics are free.  If you are interested in some of the courses, you have to go Premium ($60 per year/$5 month). The courses should have things to offer your son & support the "mindfulness" aspect of DBT.

Andrea Wachter's website is:

www.andreawachter.com/

Check out her blogs, books & audio classes on Insight Timer. She has an audio course on Insight Timer - "How To Make Peace With The Body You Live In", which addresses body image.  She has another course, "Your Anxiety Tool Kit".  Then, there is the course on the "Insight Timer" app, "Getting Over Overeating".

Andrea has two 15-minute meditations on insight Timer:  Stress Less Meditation & Kind Mind Meditation:

FOR DBT STARTERS:

1.  The self-service website below is a good starting point for DBT info. & training.  It would be a good starting point:

DBT SELF-HELP

https://www.dbtselfhelp.com/

2.  BUY SOME BOOKS & ACQUIRE SOME DBT WORKSHEETS

BOOKS
DBT Skills Training Manual, Second Edition
https://www.amazon.com/DBT%C2%AE-Skills-Training-Manual-Second/dp/1462516998

DBT® Skills Training Handouts and Worksheets, Second Edition
https://www.amazon.com/Skills-Training-Handouts-Worksheets-Second/dp/1572307811/ref=pd_bxgy_img_2/139-4744720-2169246?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=1572307811&pd_rd_r=0f82555f-5c88-474f-a5ea-108a28c4952a&pd_rd_w=skHFY&pd_rd_wg=aWw7K&pf_rd_p=4e3f7fc3-00c8-46a6-a4db-8457e6319578&pf_rd_r=NA146JT6T1SCP26WP4DB&psc=1&refRID=NA146JT6T1SCP26WP4DB

VIDEO
DBT Peer Connections Skills Training Videos
https://ilovedbt.wordpress.com/dbt-peer-connections-skills-training-video-series/dbtvideos/

WORKSHEETS
Therapist Aid
https://www.therapistaid.com/therapy-worksheets/dbt/adults

Note: Therapist Aid has a lot of resources.  You can download most worksheets without payiing a fee.  To modify or edit the worksheets, you need to join & get a paid membership.

PsychPoint
https://www.psychpoint.com/mental-health/worksheets/dbt-worksheets/

I just discovered the PsychPoint website recently.  After clicking a specific worksheet, go to the bottom of the page.  They allow a time period to read the instructions & then you can gain access to open a worksheet.

DBT CLASSES ONLINE:
I'm not sure about this one, but I'll throw out some thoughts & some info I did find.

I don't know anything about these two sources, other than I found them online:
https://emotionallysensitive.com/classes/

https://dbtclasses.com/services/

It might be worthwhile to just do a search for the area you live in (nearest larger city).  There could be a DBT source that doesn't advertise online DBT therapy, but it might be something to research.  With the Covid-19 situation, a lot of practices started doing therapy online.


ADDITIONAL INFO.
https://www.dbtproviders.com/resources.php

The 9 Best Online Therapy Programs of 2020
https://www.verywellmind.com/best-online-therapy-4691206

10 of the Best Sites for DBT Worksheets and Resources
https://www.unk.com/blog/top-ten-sites-for-dbt-worksheets/

BPD Peer Recommended Resources for Managing Quarantine & COVID-19
https://static1.squarespace.com/static/56aab18d4bf11837b0fa5fe9/t/5ea998d6bbc3423470e36c3f/1588173017074/Peer+Resource+COVID-19+Draft+uPDATED+4.27.20.pdf


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