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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means finding the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tensions.
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Author Topic: Convinced the GAL and custody evaluator  (Read 387 times)
leftunsaid

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 8


« on: September 26, 2020, 06:22:04 AM »

My stbex apparently convinced the GAL and CE that he can handle the kids 50 despite denying that the kids have special needs and having zero involvement with the kids professionals, schools etc.  He is a sociopath as well.  We have a judge who will listen and is excellent but I cant help but be worried.  Who has had success with getting the judge to ignore the timesharing recommendation of the GAL and the CE? He has not had any overnights and they are rushing to give him 50 percent. 

Thanks
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GaGrl
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner’s ex
Posts: 5722



« Reply #1 on: September 26, 2020, 10:26:06 AM »

If he is going to be 50%, then he needs to have a plan for supporting special needs, school, medical appointments, etc. on his time. Can your lawyer request that the GAL and CE get such a plan from him to be submitted to the judge?
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"...what's past is prologue; what to come,
In yours and my discharge."
leftunsaid

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 8


« Reply #2 on: October 07, 2020, 08:52:39 AM »

For sure...its also just recommendations...and not for 50 but still- my attorney is terrific and said we have a ton of evidence from experts and that we have a great judge who will listen so not a done deal...just wondering if people have had the gal and ce report ignored?
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ForeverDad
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: separated 2005 then divorced
Posts: 18073


You can't reason with the Voice of Unreason...


« Reply #3 on: October 09, 2020, 09:27:12 PM »

At the very least your lawyer can advocate for you that there be graduated steps taken from current schedule to the possible equal time.

What is ex's core reason for wanting equal time?  Is it to appear a good father to others?  Is it to sabotage you?  Is it to reduce child support?  Frankly, I've been both... alternate weekends as well as equal time.  Between them the difference in ordered payments of child support were minimal.  So if he's thinking he will save a ton of money with equal time, his lawyer needs to show him the numbers.

Odds are he wants to get equal time for whatever reasons and then over time he will revert to his comfort zone of less time.
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