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Experts share their discoveries [video]
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Caretaking - What is it all about?
Margalis Fjelstad, PhD
Blame - why we do it?
Brené Brown, PhD
Family dynamics matter.
Alan Fruzzetti, PhD
A perspective on BPD
Ivan Spielberg, PhD
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Author Topic: Hoping for help  (Read 662 times)
Sagerager
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 2


« on: November 18, 2020, 02:22:50 AM »

It’s midnight. My 16 year old has been screaming for the past 3 hours. It’s heartbreaking. We are drowning in her issues. I’m hoping again that her little brothers slept through it. Her OCD and her bulimia intertwine with her BPD and give it strength. We’ve been trying since she was 9 to get her help. She won’t take meds or go to therapy. I feel I now I have to change my focus to being her lighthouse instead of her shipmate. I need to be there for the rest of my family too. So here I am. Hopeful to learn from the experience of others.
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Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
formflier
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 19076



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« Reply #1 on: November 18, 2020, 06:12:53 AM »



Welcome

I'm so glad you found us and so sorry you have to deal with these emotionally draining outbursts.

I assure you we "get it"...the frustration...the exhaustion...the seemingly no win choices.



https://www.bpdfamily.com/content/setting-boundaries

What do you think of the article on boundaries?

What kind of support system do you have right now?

I'll check back soon to see you answer.

Best,

FF
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HurtBrooklyn

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 28


« Reply #2 on: November 18, 2020, 04:20:21 PM »

Dear Sagerager:

I'm glad you found your way here. You aren't alone dealing with a teenager full of rage. Once, when my daughter was a teenager, she was so out of control she stared to smash things in our home. I had to call the police and they stayed with us until she calmed down. I'm so glad you are choosing to be available to your other children and hope you also can start to take care of yourself. Setting boundaries are a good first step.  If you can start with one and keep to it the other boundaries could follow.  You are not to blame. I'm sorry you have to go through this.
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Sagerager
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 2


« Reply #3 on: November 20, 2020, 01:33:01 AM »

Thank you. Still processing the boundaries link. I’m lucky to have a smart and beautiful wife to solidify our approach. Getting done parental therapy/coaching next week. Fingers crossed. I’m glad I found these boards as well
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formflier
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 19076



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« Reply #4 on: November 20, 2020, 07:19:59 AM »


Have you spoken to a therapist or other mental health provider about your situation?

It's great that you and your wife are supporting each other.  One of the things you will learn from reading the stories of others on here is a big support system helps you find success.

Best,

FF
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