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WisconsinFamily
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 1


« on: November 21, 2020, 10:16:41 PM »

I need tools. My wife has traits. I’ve learned to detach but I need better tools to communicate. We have 3 little girls ages 4, 2, 1. I would love to get involved in a support group where I can learn how to better communicate.
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RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING
This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

kells76
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner’s ex
Posts: 896



« Reply #1 on: November 23, 2020, 11:34:48 AM »

Hi WisconsinFamily, welcome to the group. I'm usually over on the Family Law board, though I saw from your post that you have kids, so I thought I'd say Hi here  Welcome new member (click to insert in post)

Asking for help and skill building is a good thing -- so glad you could reach out for support; kudos for that. This is a great group for talking through new skills, how to apply the skills, and how things might look in your life short term and long term as you make some healthy, positive changes. Many tools for dealing with pwBPD (people with BPD) and people who have challenging traits (like my husband's kids' mom, and perhaps like your kids' mom) are non-intuitive and take some practice. I used to think that "explaining" or "offering more information" was helpful, but oh boy, it sure wasn't!

As we wait a bit and see who else comes along to show support, what would you say is the key or main conflict point for you and your W (wife)? Is there a "moment" in conversations you can usually look back at and say, "Yeah, things sort of went off the rails there, and that was just like most of the other conflictual conversations we have had"?

You're in a good group here with people who TRULY get it. And you deserve recognition for reaching out, because you are taking steps to care for your daughters this way.

All the best;

kells76
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