Home page of BPDFamily.com, online relationship supportMember registration here
May 11, 2021, 12:08:28 AM *
Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Login with username, password and session length
Board Admins: Harri, Once Removed
Senior Ambassadors: Cat Familiar, I Am Redeemed, Mutt, Turkish
  Help!   Groups   Please Donate Login to Post New?--Click here to register  
bing
Popular books with members
103
Surviving a
Borderline Parent

Emotional Blackmail
Fear, Obligation, and Guilt
When Parents Make
Children Their Partners
Healing the
Shame That Binds You


Pages: [1]   Go Down
  Print  
Author Topic: SUGGESTED READING  (Read 1925 times)
BPDFamily
Site Director
***
Offline Offline

What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Posts: 222



WWW
« on: December 08, 2020, 07:03:38 AM »

Suggested Reading for Members Coping and Healing from a BPD Parent, Sibling, or Inlaw  
 
Books for Learning and Healing
 
Survivor to Thriver Manual

 
The Survivor to Thriver manual is an essential guidebook for Adult Children of a BPD Parent, as well as for any survivor of physical, sexual and/or emotional child abuse or neglect. The 21 Steps are a statement of the tasks and issues that most adult survivors face during their recovery from child abuse. This 115 page manual is free to bpdfamily.com members.
 
Understanding the Borderline Mother
 
"the first book I ever read that truly described my mother.  It was a very emotionally hard read, but well worth it" -- a member
 
Many members describe reading this book as a powerful experience, reaching into their childhoods and bringing to the light things they thought nobody else could ever know. Profound and insightful, the book can be emotionally overwhelming for some. Take it slowly if you need to.

Above link also includes a link to a complete audio copy on youtube.
 
Surviving a Borderline Parent
 
A manual for understanding the impact of growing up with a borderline parent and recovering from many of the effects; includes information and exercises, the review includes comments from the co-author. This book gives you the validation you probably never had, and gives solid, practical ways to overcome the effects of growing up with a BPD parent.
 
Toxic Parents: Overcoming Their Hurtful Legacy and Reclaiming Your Life
 
An extremely helpful book for adult children of BPD parents who are going through the painful stage of revisiting their childhoods with new understanding, on the path to healing. Important note: The author recommends confronting your abusive parent(s), which is not always advisable when a parent is a BPD sufferer. Whatever choice readers make about confronting a parent, the chapters on the different kinds of abuse and other sections will provide validation, information, and comfort.
 
Healing the Shame That Binds You
 
For the adult children of BPD parents, an understanding of what the author calls "toxic shame" helps to explain the damage done by a parent whose illness caused him or her to view a child as wrong or flawed--and to find a path forward to healing.
 
The Gift of Fear
 
People raised in families with personality disordered members often never developed or lose their self-protective instincts. The Gift of Fear provides critical information and strategies for fostering in adulthood this life-saving awareness that may have been underdeveloped in childhood.
 

Articles for Learning and Healing
 
Article: Borderline Personality Disorder - A Clinical Perspective
 
Have Your Parents Put You at Risk for Psychopathology
 
Emotional Blackmail: Fear, Obligation and Guilt (FOG)
 

Workshops for Learning and Healing
 
Workshop - US: What it means to be in the “FOG”
 
Workshop - BPD: Understanding the Waif, Hermit, Queen, and Witch
 
Workshop: How a dysfunctional childhood affects our development
 
Workshop - BPD: Problematic mothering/parenting
 

Books for Coping with a Personality Disordered Relative
 
Stop Walking on Eggshells
 
This is a self-help guide for family members and about family members. It is designed to help you understand how the disorder affects you and what you can do to get off the emotional roller coasters and take care of yourself.  
 
The Essential Family Guide to Borderline Personality Disorder
 
This book is for family members of a person with Borderline Personality Disorder.   It discusses five tools to make home life more manageable for family members, and more constructive for the person affected with BPD.
 
Loving the Self-Absorbed: A Grown-Up's Guide to Getting over Narcissistic Parents
 
Realistic and practical, this book assumes that, for whatever reason, you plan to continue your relationship with a narcissistic parent. By providing insight into the your parent's motivations and behaviors, it helps to depersonalize the hurt. It also gives very specific, concrete advice for how to protect yourself from your narcissistic parent.
 
A Balanced Life: 9 Strategies for Coping with the Mental Health Problems of a Loved One
 
In readable, down-to-earth prose, A Balanced Life teaches family and friends what they can expect from those they love who have mental health problems. Tom Smith lost his own daughter, who was bipolar, to suicide, so he shares insights from personal experience that are helpful to any family member who is coping with or caring for a mentally ill relative.
 
Taking Care of Parents Who Didn't Take Care of You
 
Very helpful for adult children of personality disordered parents who choose to provide elder care.
 
Toxic In-laws
 
Useful resource for coping with a family in which personality disorders have created dysfunctional patterns. The emphasis is on understanding the type of behavior you are seeing in your partner's family and improving the situation by adjusting your expectations and behavior, over which you have control, rather than futilely trying to change your partner's family.
 

Articles for Coping with a Personality Disordered Relative
 
Article: How To Manage a BPD Relationship
 

Workshops for Coping with a Personality Disordered Relative
 
Workshop - BOUNDARIES: Upholding our values and independence
 
Tools: US: Do not allow others to 'rent space' in your 'head'
 
Tools: How to take a time out
 

Books for Working on Ourselves
 
The Ultimate Guide to Transforming Your Anger: Dynamic Tools for Healthy Relationships
 
People who cope with BPD family members are often left with a legacy of anger--underexpressed, overexpressed, or coming out at the wrong time. This book helps you to become more observant and intentional in your handling of anger, so it no longer controls you.
 
The Dance of Anger: A Woman's Guide to Changing the Patterns of Intimate Relationships
 
Not just for women, this book is a priceless source for information on triangulation, and how anger and other bad feelings are passed from person to person. Although not explicitly about BPD, adult children of BPD parents will recognize family dynamics and get clearer on how a BPD family member can create chaos in other family relationships.
 
The Dance of Intimacy: A Woman's Guide to Courageous Acts of Change in Key Relationships
 
The genogram concept is extremely helpful to seeing family patterns across generations--where you fit in and how you can act to stop perpetuating an unhealthy legacy of personality disordered or other unhealthy behavior.
 
Codependent No More
 
This book will help anyone who is thinking or feeling responsible for other people, feel it is your responsibility to help other people solve their problems, feel needy people are always attracted to you, and feeling unappreciated or used; or you have weak boundaries with the people in your life; you have dependency issues; poor communication; and low self-worth.
 
Full Catastrophe Living
 
Growing up in a BPD environment, we become highly reactive. Our emotions may be numbed or feel completely overwhelming--or a little of both. It is hard to solve problems and move forward with your healing and your life until you can achieve a feeling of calm and some "clean white space" to work on things. Full Catastrophe Living teaches the practice of mindfulness--taking an observer stance--in a simple and accessible way.
 

Articles for Working on Ourselves
 
Article: Controlling Anger -- Before It Controls You
 
Article: Stop Being Tortured by Your Own Thoughts
 
Article: Ten Forms of Twisted Thinking
 
Article: Ten Ways to Untwist Your Thinking
 
Article: On-Line Cognitive Behavioral Treatment Therapy
Logged

Can You Help Us Stay on the Air in 2021?

Pages: [1]   Go Up
  Print  
 
Jump to:  

Our 2020 Financial Sponsors
We are all appreciative of the members who provide the funding to keep BPDFamily on the air.
40days_in_desert
Ahquei3s
alphabeta
Amethyste
Angie59
ArtistGuy70
AskingWhy
assumezero
At Bay
Avanzando
Baglady
Beneck
bigredneck
Bittlecat
Boll Weevil
calmboom
Cat Familiar
Chosen
Dnmtnbkr
drained1996
Eggshellsbroken
FaintTheGoat
FaithHopeLove
FindingMe2011
Forgiveness
freespirit
GaGrl
ggGreg
Gift to Myself
gotbushels
Harri
hopeandchoices
I Am Redeemed
Imatter33
Jazzy48
jdc
jones54
Jonthan
Katrinalove
Kwamina
l8kgrl
LLgreen
Longterm
lorymac
lovenature
loyalwife
lucidone
Manifest32f
MariannaR
Meridius
Methuen
mgirl
Minttea
Mommydoc
Mutt
narcdaughter2
needPeace
NorseWoman
Notgoneyet
oceanheart
oftentimes
Omega1
once removed
Only Human
otherlife
palynne
PeacefulMom
Pedro
pest947
podsnapG
ProudDad12
pursuingJoy
Radcliff
Raul
Recycle
Resiliant
Rev
Rosheger
Sad4Her
SamwizeGamgee
Sandalwood
SBBayArea
SCM
SerendipityChild
SES
Silverhope
Skip
songbirdtwo
StillStuck
Swimmy55
Teno
townhouse
truthbeknown
turtleengine501
Ventak
vinnie77
Violet00
wavewatcher
wendydarling
WhatJustHappened?
Whichwayisup
whirlpoollife
Wicker Man
WindofChange
worn_out
WTL
zachira
zaqsert

Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Powered by SMF 1.1.21 | SMF © 2006-2020, Simple Machines Valid XHTML 1.0! Valid CSS!