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Things I couldn't have known
Emotional Blackmail: Fear, Obligation and Guilt (FOG)
Am I the Cause of Borderline Personality Disorder?
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I think it's Borderline Personality Disorder, but how can I know?
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Author Topic: I'm new here  (Read 363 times)
Mom44!
Fewer than 3 Posts
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 2


« on: April 04, 2021, 07:58:58 AM »

Have a teen son with bpd. Just learned that's what going on with him after years of tying to figure him out. I need some support and am so happy to find this resource. I feel badly that I don't manage him better and want to learn some new skills. He's an exhausting kid to be around (feel bad even saying that, but it's true). Our family is trying to find a center that offers dbt therapy (long waiting lists) and hope we can get him and ourselves on a happier, healthier path. Hello to everyone. Thanks for having me here.
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Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
Swimmy55
Retired Staff
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Gender: Female
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Estranged
Posts: 809



« Reply #1 on: April 05, 2021, 01:20:20 PM »

Welcome and thanks for adding us to your support network.  Take a look around this forum/ site , look through the pull down menus, etc.   There is also suggested reading in the library here. Yes it is very exhausting being around a BPD child.  It is good that you found this out while he is still a child and therefore can have more influence in getting him help.  Please feel free to share more as you are comfortable, we are here for you.
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losttrust

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: divorced
Posts: 49


« Reply #2 on: April 07, 2021, 01:17:06 PM »

Agree with swimmy.  Lots of great resources here, stories and cautionary tales too.  Best to help while you have input still. At 18 you don’t /won’t. Beyond liability and fiscal responsibility  —- if I could go back in time -I’d look for a BPD /CBT team -intensive program with a  medical side expert in BPD folks  and a therapy expert trained in  BPT/DPT/CBT - ASAP. 

 We were sent down so many rabbit holes to non effective meds with side effects and therapists who didn’t understand BPD not skilled to treat BPD - which only added pain and loss of trust.   
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Rebbeca

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 7


« Reply #3 on: April 10, 2021, 12:59:04 AM »

Hi mom44
I’m also new here.
Having a child that finds life more difficult than most is heartbreaking and frustrating. All you want is to make things better.
It sounds like you are trying so hard to help him. Be proud of all you are trying to do.

I have a daughter who shows the signs of BPD. I knew nothing about BPD until a few years ago. My daughter is now 28.

I hope for you, finding out earlier will make a big difference.

I’m not sure if you feel the same but I find fighting to help your child can be a lonely scary place. Having others to talk to is such a blessing.
Sending you best wishes
Rebbeca

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adaptable

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What is your sexual orientation: Confidential
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Child
Relationship status: parent
Posts: 5


« Reply #4 on: April 13, 2021, 11:07:30 AM »

Our family is also just beginning the healing journey this DX commands. I have just read many of the " is it my fault" posts... very validating. I know the mistakes we made, we now know the highly sensitive temperment of our teen and are working with her to create new relationship patterns. 
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