Talk to my Ex

[Ballet]

My Ex has Depression and Anxiety and now, I believe he has a personality disorder. I need help because I love him very much! I would do anything for him. I need to know the best way to talk to him. It's been a year since I've seen him last.  We talk on the phone, text, email, and are friends on social media. I reached out to him by relating to him with jokes that make him laugh and movies he enjoys. I was making recommendations for him to watch movies with the actors I know he likes. I know he is hiding the way this disorder makes him feel. I want to learn about the disorder. What is the best way to communicate with him without fighting with him? Or accidentally putting him down?
My goal is to learn about this disorder and to find a better way to connect with him. To slowly build up a better friendship on his terms. I've always been there for him. I would do anything for him and each day without him is my own nightmare. I suffer because he suffers. I want to help but don't know how. Please let me know. Thank you.
"Ballet Girl"

[RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING]

RELATIONSHIP PROBLEM SOLVING This is a high level discussion board for solving ongoing, day-to-day relationship conflicts. Members are welcomed to express frustration but must seek constructive solutions to problems. This is not a place for relationship "stay" or "leave" discussions. Please read the specific guidelines for this group.

[Vincenta]

Hi Ballet,

And welcome  good that you found us!

What makes you think that your friend has BPD? Is he diagonased ?

You can find very good advise for communication under the tools bar here, you might want to study them.


Keep learning and keep posting here - you are not alone!

Warm regards

Vincenta



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[alterK]

Hi Ballet. I 100% agree with Vincenta. The best thing you can do for yourself and your relationship is to learn more. I found most of the books listed on this website under "tools" on Amazon before I saw them here. If you are at all like me you will be astounded at how much you can learn about your partner and yourself, and how many things you can try in order to improve communication.