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Topic: Vacationing with my Adult child (Read 553 times)
Wickd1
Fewer than 3 Posts
Offline
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: Married
Posts: 1
Vacationing with my Adult child
«
on:
November 19, 2021, 01:11:31 PM »
New here! I believe both my adult daughter and my husband have bpd.
I have to trace to a wedding at a Mexico resort with my daughter next month.
I am looking for support and advice about how to get along with her in this trip.
It will either be a time for us to make good memories together or a goal
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Our objective
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to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders
Sancho
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Posts: 940
Re: Vacationing with my Adult child
«
Reply #1 on:
November 25, 2021, 10:04:47 PM »
Hi Wicked1
In my experience going Grey Stone Rock is the best way to spend extended time with a BPD person. It might sound extreme, but it has been the best thing for me.
My rules are:
I don't initiate a conversation unless I have to.
If I do have to I use a minimum of words.
If there is an outburst I stay quiet.
In any situation where BPD person's anxiety is raised, the slightest trigger will set things off. And the person that they dump on will get it, etc.
In my mind the way I do this is I envisage that I am journeying alongside BPD dd. Usually if I was with someone and not talking I would feel uncomfortable etc and chat on. But I have learnt to put my mind on something else when I am with BPD dd.
I think this helps a feeling of separation which helps stop the dumping. So I am not ignoring as such - just thinking about something else. If I am addressed I answer in a pleasant way with few words - and a smile if appropriate.
I hope it is a good time for you!
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