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Author Topic: Could really use some thoughts/help/insight/whatever on an urgent matter  (Read 485 times)
Tired Llama

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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Relationship status: living together
Posts: 6


« on: September 05, 2022, 08:17:52 PM »

So this may sound stupid or be completely the wrong place for this question but I thought I'd see if anyone has encountered similar and had any insights of what I could be expecting.

My now EXgf wBPD just texted my saying she wants her dog back, TONIGHT (even though its late, but wont happen tonight but not sure about tomorrow), we tried doing a joint custody arrangement with both dogs since I moved out but ultimately the dogs act like dogs and she calls me to "come get my dogs or" something along the lines of getting rid of them or "you better get this f#$%ing dog", she has abandoned a cat (maybe two cats, one before I knew her) and one of the dogs has been mine now since I left because it'll forever be a bad dog in her eyes and she doesn't want it back.

I should be able to easily make the case they are mine as they are registered under my name and vets under me etc, and I think she's only doing this to hurt me because she's mad at me currently and doesnt want to see me for the for seeable future.

My question/fear is, if I don't give her the dog what should I expect do you think? The past year she's just been getting angrier and worse and the stress of an ongoing custody battle with her ex husband, brother suicide, and kids starting school, and me not there to do everything for her, I don't think she'll just give up or be rational, she certainly hasn't been lately but should I worry about her escalating things to a extreme? Will I have to worry about her making false claims to the police saying I abused her or the kids just to make my life hell if I don't return the dog?

Maybe the years of being with her has me overreacting and thinking about this all wrong/too extremely but I feel like I don't know her anymore or what kind of over the top crazy stuff she'd be willing to do to make me hurt or get back at me. It currently seems she hates me with the same passion she hates her ex husband, as she's been claiming I've been doing the same things to her as he did (which was being polite and asking if she wanted anything when I went out to get myself food from time to time), she has called the police on him before claiming she was abused but they didn't do anything (maybe they didn't find anything idk) he is an idiot but all the rest of the info on him comes from her so what's true or not idk.

Any thoughts/guidance/help/similar stories/etc would be greatly appreciated, I don't want to part with my pup but will do if prevents worse from happening, as I can't care for the two dogs if I'm broke from legal fees dealing with keeping her away or her making false claims to further ruin my life.


'
« Last Edit: September 05, 2022, 08:26:47 PM by Tired Llama » Logged
BigOof
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Never-ending divorce
Posts: 376



« Reply #1 on: September 05, 2022, 08:35:09 PM »

You're being manipulated. Set a schedule and stick to it.
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ForeverDad
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: separated 2005 then divorced
Posts: 18438


You can't reason with the Voice of Unreason...


« Reply #2 on: September 06, 2022, 06:42:36 PM »

Did you save the emails or texts where she told you to come get them?  That would be a very good defense to thwart expensive litigation.

I would try not to enter into shared custody of pets with allocated time.  The relationship has ended.  How long will this ended relationship contact continue?

Excerpt
her prior relationship guy is an idiot but all the rest of the info on him comes from her so what's true or not idk.

One of our members famously quipped, if the ex's mouth or tongue is wagging, it's likely lies (or a personal perception).
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