Elder Daughter with BPD

[SamIndia]

I have three kids. Elder daughter aged 20 years diagnosed with BPD three years back left home one morning, went to a distant stage and married a boy. Staying with the estranged family. Not ready to come back. My second son is an Autism child. 12 years of age attending a special school.  My elder daughter was showing signs of severe disobedience, irritating behaviour since childhood days and as days passed by it aggravated. so we decided to have a third child. Gifted with a girl child in 2018. Now she is 5 years old. She is now showing the same signs of BPD. We are afraid, she will also grow up  and follow the steps of her sister. We are really upset and frustrated as to how to deal with this. Advise from a local Psychologist is also not helping.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Sancho]

Hi SamIndia
You have had many challenging years on the journey with your two elder children and now . . .

I can only imagine the grief you are feeling at the moment. You mention you don't feel the advice from your local psychologist is helpful and that you are concerned that your youngest is showing signs of BPD. You have been through this part of the journey once before so you will be able to recognise traits/signs etc. It is also the case that some psychologists are not very aware of BPD and it's treatments.

Can I ask what kinds of behaviours is your youngest child showing, and also what advice is the psychologist giving?

It really is a dilemma for you because there are other conditions that have similar signs/behaviours and BPD is not formatlly diagnosed until much later - which is why your eldest daughter was diagnosed around 17 years of age I imagine.

Are there any other psychologists you could access? Is there a paediatric psychiatrist you could see? I hope you are able to get some support while your child is young and you can work together to a positive outcome.

Glad you have come here. I hope accessing some of the resources will be helpful too.