Medication

[MommaCJL]

This is my first post.  I have an 18 year old daughter who was diagnosed with BPD about a year ago.  She has been going to a psychiatrist since age 15.  She is now on a mood stabilizer, an antipsychotic, and gabapentin for anxiety.  She has been on this combination for 2 years.  I strongly feel that the medications are making things worse rather than better. 
Her psychiatrist has tried to wean her off, but the side effects of coming off are too much.
Has anyone's child had success coming off medication?

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[kells76]

Hi MommaCJL and a warm to the group.

It sounds like your D18 is somewhat compliant with meds and treatment? That can be a really good thing. How did she respond to getting the diagnosis?

Were the meds prescribed for BPD specifically, or for comorbid stuff? We have had members here with BPD loved ones with comorbidities such as bipolar, who were on bipolar meds. Anxiety, bipolar, and depression, for example, tend to be more responsive to meds (or can be) than BPD, which isn't chemically based.

In my late teens to early 20s, as I was finishing treatment for an eating disorder, I was on Zoloft and Seroquel (though I can't remember if they were at the same time or not). I came off both, though I did get the weird discontinuation symptom where it was like an old-school film movie jumped ahead a couple of frames. I don't know the exact technical term for that.

How quickly has her psych tried to taper? And what side effects did she have?

Fill us in, whenever you have a moment that works for you. Glad you found us;

kells76

[CC43]

Hi Momma,

I imagine you must feel distressed about your daughter's behavior and the difficulty finding medications or treatment that work for her.  That she is compliant in taking the medications is a strong positive in my opinion.

I'll share with you some thoughts, which may or may not be applicable in your case.  As background, I have a stepdaughter in her mid-20s who has been diagnosed with BPD.  Since adulthood, her mood has been very dark, and her emotions are dysregulated.  She often complains of anxiety.  When she is taking medications for the dark mood and anxiety, she seems to do better.  Her behavior worsened when she quit the medications, but her behavior improved again when she resumed.

Another observation is that my stepdaughter's behaviors, including raging, blaming, pervasive negativity and suicide attempts, resulted in ruptured relationships and lack of success in study or work.  The situation seemed to worsen after she turned 18 and went to college, and got even worse again at 21-23.  I wonder if her dysfunction worsened because she was increasingly facing adult-level problems with the emotional skills of a child.  As the pressure of complex social relationships, college-level schoolwork and forays into adulthood increased, she just couldn't handle it, as she was "handicapped" by a lack of emotion control, in my opinion.  She quit activities, and yet she resented missing out on those very same activities.  I believe she became plagued by FOMO, as peers and siblings progressed, while she seemed to be stuck in a rut.  She became completely dependent on her father, while at the same time resenting his help.  In my opinion, this created a pernicious downward spiral.  In summary, the world had expectations for my stepdaughter to behave like an adult, but she was acting like she was 13-15.  And looking back on things, when she was 18, I think her behavior resembled that of a tween, but the disparity just wasn't as obvious.  I chalked it up to her being a late bloomer.  Would that resonate with you?

Basically I'm asking, might it be that your daughter's worsening behavior or symptoms relate to the pressure cooker of emerging adulthood, rather than the medications per se?  If your daughter is facing college, is she overtaken by feelings of "abandonment" and the lack of daily parental support?  Could that be triggering your daughter's issues?

The upshot is that with therapy and medication, my stepdaughter is now taking baby steps in the right direction.  I hope that your daughter also eventually finds a treatment regime that works for her.  Again I think it's very good that your daughter is actually taking her prescribed medications.