How common is suicide with BPD.

[Depression = 72% of members]

Hello thank you for having me on this wonderful site. I wish I had you all in my back pocket years ago. I have a diagnosed twin, 2 other sisters a mother father and partner of 20 yrs who are all have a lot of personality disorganisation. All of the symptoms match to a greater or lesser degree. The are all successful or high functioning. I couldn't have been clear about this when I was younger but now in my 50's with several pysical health problems I am more isolated than ever and had a period of depression and some cognitive therapy after the death of our mother.
My 1st question is how common are suicidal thoughts and self harm with BPD?
It makes sense that these strong emotions are turned inwards aswell as kept very private/in family but all of them are level 1-2. Does that mean most of them don't have theses feelings most of the time.?

[rockinghorse]

Hello thank you for having me on this wonderful site. I wish I had you all in my back pocket years ago. I have a diagnosed twin, 2 other sisters a mother father and partner of 20 yrs who are all have a lot of personality disorganisation. All of the symptoms match to a greater or lesser degree. The are all successful or high functioning. I couldn't have been clear about this when I was younger but now in my 50's with several pysical health problems I am more isolated than ever and had a period of depression and some cognitive therapy after the death of our mother.
My 1st question is how common are suicidal thoughts and self harm with BPD?
It makes sense that these strong emotions are turned inwards aswell as kept very private/in family but all of them are level 1-2. Does that mean most of them don't have theses feelings most of the time.?

[Swimmy55]

Hi and welcome,
 According to this website, BPD have 10 %  chance of suicide.https://bpdfamily.com/content/borderline-personality-disorder-clinical-overview
Also there is a section on suicide on this forum if you type it in above in the "Search BPD Family Site".
I am not sure I can answer about the feelings of BPD or what exactly Level 1-2 mean.  However, please take a look around here as there is a wealth of information as well as book suggestions to read.    It is great you had some therapy.
You are not alone, please write more about yourself as you feel comfortable. 
 

[rockinghorse]

Thanks. I think by level 1-2 I meant mild to moderate dysfunction. I feel reassured by your reply.
 I have a arrangement with my twin, if she gets really unwell and doesn't answer for 2 days I'll contact police/work/daughter as a point of safety. She's was worried about living alone something happening and not being found for weeks! I wish I could help more but when she's not good at keeping in touch and she will not keep her word even when she is well.
Now my dad is very frail he keeps in touch on socal media/ phone/texts and he's 80! but none of my sisters answer texts reliably, one hasn't replied for 2 years.
My partner (SO) doesn't keep in touch with his family either. I could but he wont let me. Every birthday/holiday is a bit of struggle.
Is this possibly Shame based? You put something off and it becomes a thing. It could also be control issues perhaps? One sister is ghosting me- a big factor in my depression. Another way to wound each other? I don't know!
 To regain control I have written her a letter- burnt it! And I've currently blocked her!  It seems an extreme thing to do but I've lost my mother and now my sister. I want to grieve and have it done. I think she is punishing the world for our mother leaving her by dying. I think she has unlimited fuel now. But her partner puts little messages out on social media about what theyre up to and I send likes. He is so kind. He is sending little life rafts to try and bridge the chasm of this horrible disease.