Keitho22,
sounds like a lot of threats and drama in your marriage . Both sides feel there is a big crisis and it could lead to breakup. That of course is triggering abandonment making the whole mess quite a bit messier .
Read up on validation. The first step is to stop making it worse i.e. deny that there is a crisis, that things are bad etc... .Second step would be to validate that there is a crisis, that things are bad, that things must change a lot, that she is extremely unhappy etc... .
I feel so much stress and pressure from her every single day with every word she says to me.
Sounds like you are struggling to keep her projections at bay. How are you doing with respect to
boundaries?
I feel like I might me able to save this but for now I need to learn how to cope or get help for her or both of us.
Take a deep breath. There is a wealth of information and support on this site no matter how the situation develops. You may work from your end to restore the relationship and that may well work. It may also not work - nobody can tell. You can't really control the outcome but you can control yourself and what you do. That is quite important - your energy to turn around the situation is limited - and knowing it is limited it should be spent wisely.
And I get frustrated and respond accordingly.
Turning around starts with us turning around. Sharing your frustration, confusion and asking questions on the board is a good first step
.
How have you tried to reduce conflicts? Do you have a T? How have you found us?
Again, welcome to the board,
a0