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Author Topic: Rules  (Read 419 times)
grayday1
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« on: November 16, 2010, 01:01:15 PM »

My exBPDbf had lots of rules for himself and rules for dating and new r/s?

Is this part of the disorder?
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CaptainM
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Relationship status: Recently separated permanently. Together for 6 years prior.
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« Reply #1 on: November 16, 2010, 03:24:34 PM »

My exBPDbf had lots of rules for himself and rules for dating and new r/s?

Is this part of the disorder?

Can you give an example of what you mean?

My partner has pretty much no 'rules' for herself - that's one of the issues.  ;p
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grayday1
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« Reply #2 on: November 16, 2010, 04:01:26 PM »

Yes...

1. No smokers

2. No ex-husbands in the picture

3. No small children

4. No dogs

5. etc... .

Is this a normal part of choices you won't accept when your thinking about dating someone?

He talkes about these rules... .but when he finds an interested "victim" these go out the window.
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« Reply #3 on: November 16, 2010, 04:16:31 PM »

Excerpt
Is this part of the disorder?

It is a facet of OCPD. OCPD is not OCD or obsessive compulsive disorder. OCPD is obsessive compulsive personality disorder. Sounds the same but very different. People with OCD are often aware that their obsessions are abnormal, but are compelled to perform them anyway, like hand washing. People with obsessive compulsive personality disorder, however, believe their need for strict order and rules takes precedence over the activity at hand. www.brainphysics.com/oc-personality.php

Even though OCPD is considered in the Cluster C category- it has a large subset in the Cluster B- because of Malignant Narcissism. According to the DSM, OCPD is a mental disorder where an individual strives for success by using rules to get there. Perfection is the ultimate goal of the OCPD person, and failure is seen as unacceptable. These rules seem necessary to the personality- but accordance to them actually hinders their life and causes more stress when the unrealistic rules cannot be maintained- especially by others. It causes great difficulty in their interpersonal relationships.

Many people with OCPD were taught these rules in childhood and suffer trained thought (brainwashing.)

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