Had to break NC to discuss Divorce

[Cimbaruns]

I had to call my exBPD spouse re: taxes and moving ahead with divorce... .  

I thought it was important to have that discussion via phone and not in an email... .  I guess that was a mistake ... .  

Without getting into much of a discussion I stated my reasons and said that this was a very difficult discussion for me...

She basically told me that she didn't understand my lack of communication over the last month( this after she drove me absolutely crazy with her one day understanding

That we were over... to... .  why why why please)

She ended with she was very angry with me and said goodbye... .  

At that moment I felt overwhelming anxiety(of course) but because

I have had 3 weeks of NC I think it has helped me get through this horrible moment!

I still am reeling

I see by being outside of the relationship that its ALL about them and how they're are feeling at the moment...

Still so hard to wrap my head around it... .  and we've been apart since November!


Ugh... .  

Anyone else have this experience?

[blecker]

If you don't want to contact her any decent attorney will handle all those "questions that need answering".

I don't know your particular situation but I do know that ANY contact I had with my X resulted in chaos. And if I tried to quell the chaos then I got more chaos and then if I played hard to get and hid quietly in some dark place and then cutely tried to peek I got more chaos.

I could not change her. Ever.