Welcome to PI! It is a great place to work on our own "stuff."
Depression is really hard. It is also very common. You are not alone feeling this way. Most importantly, it will not last forever. It is encouraging to see you are ready to do the work to turn things around.
I found two helpful things on this board today. First, I love the quote that balancing act uses: "I got where I got when I got there, and I will yet get where I will get when I get there."
I also read about the recommendation for MoodGym. I already have Burns' book, Feeling Good, but I am inclined to try MoodGym also.
That is a great quote! It is so important to accept where we are and work at our own pace.
Those are also good materials to work with. When we can recognize our negative thinking and start to challenge and replace it, we have a new paradigm on which to base our feelings about ourselves. This is the basis of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Using FeelingGood or MoodGym might be a very good place to start. Do you also have access to a human therapist? Is T something you have already been considering?
Wishing you peace,
PF