Climbing Out of Depression

[Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse...]

I am climbing an emotional ladder questing for relief from depression.  Up until now I have been posting on the Healing from a Relationship with a Parent with BPD board.  I think this Personal Inventory board might be a good fit for me now.

I am having a blue day, having relapsed into feeling like a looser, and wondering how near or far away from depression I am on my ladder ascent away from it.

I found two helpful things on this board today.  First, I love the quote that balancing act uses:  "I got where I got when I got there, and I will yet get where I will get when I get there."

I also read about the recommendation for MoodGym. I already have Burns' book, Feeling Good, but I am inclined to try MoodGym also.

Ever hopeful and with warm regards to you all!

[Diligence]

I am climbing an emotional ladder questing for relief from depression.  Up until now I have been posting on the Healing from a Relationship with a Parent with BPD board.  I think this Personal Inventory board might be a good fit for me now.

I am having a blue day, having relapsed into feeling like a looser, and wondering how near or far away from depression I am on my ladder ascent away from it.

I found two helpful things on this board today.  First, I love the quote that balancing act uses:  "I got where I got when I got there, and I will yet get where I will get when I get there."

I also read about the recommendation for MoodGym. I already have Burns' book, Feeling Good, but I am inclined to try MoodGym also.

Ever hopeful and with warm regards to you all!

[Mara2]

Hi diligence, welcome to PI.  I am going through the mood gym and I like it.  I think you might as well.

Remember when you are climbing a ladder- never look down, just move one more step up.  Eventually you get to the top!  We will be cheering you on.   

[P.F.Change]

  Welcome to PI! It is a great place to work on our own "stuff."

Depression is really hard. It is also very common. You are not alone feeling this way. Most importantly, it will not last forever. It is encouraging to see you are ready to do the work to turn things around.

I found two helpful things on this board today.  First, I love the quote that balancing act uses:  "I got where I got when I got there, and I will yet get where I will get when I get there."

I also read about the recommendation for MoodGym. I already have Burns' book, Feeling Good, but I am inclined to try MoodGym also.

That is a great quote! It is so important to accept where we are and work at our own pace.

Those are also good materials to work with. When we can recognize our negative thinking and start to challenge and replace it, we have a new paradigm on which to base our feelings about ourselves. This is the basis of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy. Using FeelingGood or MoodGym might be a very good place to start.  Do you also have access to a human therapist? Is T something you have already been considering?

Wishing you peace,

PF

[Diligence]

Dear Mara2 and P.F.Change,

Thank you for your reminder to not look down while climbing up a ladder.  (I feel dizzy when on heights.)

I have a therapist.  She graciously offered her services on a long-term basis at the end of a single summer during which I was wanting to resolve all my issues.  A year and a half into therapy, she shared her long-held suspicion that I have an uBPDm.  It was shortly after that revelation that I found bpdfamily.com.

Probably the biggest obstacle in my healing is to emerge from lifelong isolation that I did not recognize until I committed to therapy.

On that note, thank you for elevating responses to this post from zero to two.  I appreciate your input!

Warm regards!

[P.F.Change]

I have a BPDm also... .   I understand how isolating it can be. I am working on overcoming some of the trauma.  I'm really glad you found the boards. It is so helpful finding out there are others who understand. It's great that you have a T also.

What steps are you taking in terms of coming out of isolation? I am working on opening up to my friends more.

PF

[Mara2]

I also have an uBPDm and married a BPD.  I am working on changing my inner dialog (what I tell myself and getting rid of my mom's voice in my head) and setting boundries. 

Have you tried out the mood gym yet?  I am also curious to hear what steps you are taking to come out of isolation. 

By the way- love your avatar! 

[Diligence]

Dear P.F.Change and Mara2,

Here are my methods to escape isolation.  (I am not consistent, but I am less isolated than when I started recovery.) 

• I sporadically go to Weight Watcher meetings - I am a lifetime member. I use them as a support group experience so I can spend time with other people who are willing to share their struggle with food.



• I participate in a mid-week Bible study with adults similar to my age.  This is one of the best interventions I give myself because I am not the only divorced member.  I experience empathy.

• I attend a 12-step program.  My particular group is well attended by women who are willing to be transparent, humorous, and supportive.  (It is a blessing because groups definitely vary in quality.)



• I attend church and adult Sunday school fairly regularly.

I do have friends.  But, do you know what?  Whenever I am in a depression skid I am immediately convinced that I have no friends.  The last thing I want to do is pick up the phone because my wrongheaded thinking tells me no one wants to hear from a loser. 

It is enormously tough to make my own plans with friends.

Warm regards!

P.S.  I have yet to try MoodGym.[/list]