For those who think thier next relationship will be better.

[emotionaholic]

IT WONT!

I have had virtually NC with my ex Borderline for 9 months.  Though I still have some contact with her ex husband due to our kids being friends so I do get tidbits of information through him. 

They are going through a custody battle right now and considering that I am the only one in her life who has looked into her condition he has called me from time to time to get my opinion on how to deal with her. 

The other night he called me simply to give me a heads up that I should expect a call from her in the near future. 

Very quickly after our 3 year relationship she started seeing a guy she worked with.  After only a handful of months she moved in with him, not even telling her son that they were moving until the day before.  This was sometime around the first of the year.  Then apparently she quit her well paying accounting job of two years, she must have finally found her meal ticket.  Then a huge fight and she and her son get kicked out.  That lasted all of a month or two.

She is now single, unemployed, and homeless. 

I did hear that she is living with her brother and his family, which is good.  He is a good man and the only person in her family who she talks to.

The moral of the story is will the next one be different.  Yes.  But not necessarily in a good way.

It does hurt however seeing someone you love so much make such horrible decisions.

[HealingForMe]

When i read the title, I thought you meant your next r/s wont be better, but now I realise you meant the exBPD's next r/s.

Yes, pwBPD are doomed to repeat the cycle over & over until they accept they have a problem & choose to do something about it, which unfortunatley it seems most wont/cant.

That makes it very difficult for us as we tend to be empathetic people, which is why the pwBPD sought us out in the first place. But it means its difficult for us to stay NC when we know they are suffering. But there's nothing we can do. They have to help themselves, we cant do it for them.

Stay strong & good luck 

[allinasmile]

It will never be better!  I feel that after 8 weeks the veil is finally being lifted. This website has helped so much in reminding me why I left.  A posting that stated if someone were to come into our home and take all of our valuables get caught red handed but never admit to it and then will not return your things and then that  person would knock on your door with his charming ways would you allow them in  Heck no you would not. That's what they do!

My exBPD and his BPD 25 yr old daughter would never admit any of their crazy behavior. They continuously would discusss how justified they were in their horrible treatment and how the other person in their latest battle had done them wrong. The BPD daughter bragged about all the relationships her dad had that she broke up, oh and I knew I was on the list  They would actually high 5 each other when they thought they had conquered or paid a person back that they had usually initiated a battle with  Sick behavior. He was diagnosed years ago for bipolar (i believe it to be BPD) and took medication intermittently she was diagnosed and now a psychology major so she thinks she is smart enough to get better. As well she self medicates with pain killers and alcohol  i hear tale now they are out getting drunk frequently and when i walked out after 8 years and 4 redos he was back on dating web sites immediately  I got smart this time, i sent a simple text that I needed a break from the relationship, then immediately blocked them both from facebook, cell phone and email  They are a pair and I dont't want drama, pain, or mean spirited people in my life. They will suck the life out of you chew you up and spit you out and tell you it's all your fault. No Thanks.