she contacted my family

[Lion Fire]

after blanking several attempts from her to connect and meet, she has applied another tactic to try to reach me.

She contacted my aunt (who she met once for a few hours) by email, telling her that she is still devastated about the end of our relationship. She told my aunt she is moving to my home city (where she thinks I still am) to study Psychotherapy ( aye right ) and asked her to look out for accommodation.

My aunt was irritated. She knows the whole story. She asked me what I think she should do and I told her to just give her a number of an agent she knows and blank her from there. I told her I want absolutely nothing to do with her. Neither does she.

What a silly and obvious attempt this was to try and get through to me and let me know what she's doing. I am in another country now.

One thing I remember her saying often was that I am the only man that has ever said no to her. I resisted her advances to be in a relationship with her for 2 years and I was the one who left her, initiated and stuck to NC. She is so prideful and I know that this feels like a defeat for her. I know for a fact that she has dumped and discarded many men before me.

Perhaps this is her time to feel the pain (not that I'm not) and learn from it. One thing is for sure is that she is not welcome with my family and that she isn't coming back into my world.

The seductive vixen became the vile abuser and is now the scared and desperate little girl.

[patientandclear]

You are doing a great job of taking care of yourself LF. I am always so impressed with (and envious of) your clarity and good judgment.

Sounds like she has regrets; but unfortunately, rarely do these regrets come along with any insight or ability to change the basic dynamic.

[myself]

If it ain't broke, don't fix it.

If it's too broke, don't fix it.

The pwBPD isn't, in their eyes, responsible for breaking OR fixing.

Your aunt doesn't need to respond.

It keeps a door open by playing along.

Your ex can figure things out for herself. Or not.

[Mutt]

Yeah my ex contacted my mom and projected. She was telling her how terrible I am with the kids. My mom knows the entire story and she's the one that clued me in I'm dealing with a disorder, unbeknownst to my ex. My mom asked me what to do, she was frustrated and angry because she knows what she put me through in the divorce. Family like to stick up for each other and she's being protective like a mother. I told her you have a right to be angry at her, best thing to do, ignore the email and let it go.