BPD's becoming therapists

[Lion Fire]

My exBPDgf is obsessed with becoming a therapist.

She bombed out of a course a couple of years ago due to "personal issues". She contacted my family recently to tell them (probably to tell me) that she is moving to my home city from London to finish off her course.

Damn! She was so into it. She told me it was her dream, her destiny. She wanted to live a life of service and help others... .sounded good at the time but I'm not so sure now   

She would therapise me to the point where I honestly believed I was insane. She had a way of convincing me that I was sick. She is very intelligent and articulate too. Once she even conducted a sort of mock therapy session while we were having sex to "work through childhood trauma I was holding". Asking me questions and stuff. The words extremely bizarre would best describe this little session. 

I actually think she would make an excellent psychologist. It would mean that she would be able to dodge her own stuff while helping others. How she'll hold a personal intimate relationship down remains to be seen. She very beautiful and I can see a few 'Tony Soprano' situations happening along the way 

This is not the first time I have heard or experienced this. A good mate of mine who works in 12 Step Treatment centres in South Africa told me that Applied Psychology colleges there are full of addicts (particularly women) out of rehab riddled with personality disorders.

Does this strike a chord with anyone? .

[Aussie JJ]

Mine is studying clinical psycology... .

And she will make a ___ psycologist.  She will be good for a small period of time but counter transferance will be such a problem for her... .

Until you work on yourself,  there is that line we have to be better ourselves to be better for them.  She wont get better. 

[stove monkey]

My uBPDw has been seeing a therapist since January, of course not one versed in BPD and DBT. She did go through a course of anger management, didn't work. I was hoping for a change for the better, but low and behold, she latched on to this therapy thing as "fascinating"!

Now she is what I consider to be worse. I have been diagnosed by her as a porn addict and compulsive liar with cognitive distortions and that I need serious help NOW. That I am a sick sick human with deep rooted childhood trauma that I need to get to the bottom of. I am seriously damaged. She has the full court press on me trying to force me into treatment for all these thing which I am not. It's really mind blowing.

I know it's just a new way to justify the way she has treated me and our D over the years, to ease her shame as if I agreed to any of this she would have "proof", that it was me all along. The scary part is, I don't think she is doing it intentionally for that, I think she really has convinced herself that I am all these horrible things. It's wired into her to feel this way.

She is very smart as well, not so high functioning anymore though.

It's so frustrating to hear this crap all the time then get the texts and emails trying to convince me that I'm damaged in the disguise of "support".

She needs to STFU and work on herself and I'll deal with myself, by leaving:0

D has moved out and is away from the crazy so I don't need to hang around any longer, just until I can afford to make the move.

[goldylamont]

my ex has a history of working with special needs children. the last i heard she was a counselor for young boys at some sort of boys' facility. someone told me a while ago that she was having trouble at the job after being "attacked" by one of the kids there. while this can occur in these types of jobs, my initial thought was that this is exactly the type of situation that she would actually either cause, or lie or exaggerate about. makes me shudder to think now that some disenfranchised boy may have been at her mercy, but not my problem anymore.

[Tausk]

Mine is a Ph.D student in Social Work.

There are a tremendous number of Disordered people working in the "healing" and "service" fields.  And it doesn't mean that they are bad at their work because depersonalization is possible in those situations.  It's the close interpersonal relationships, especially with significant others that many of the issues surface.

[Huh?]

Haha! I was just thinking about starting a thread about this subject as I drove home from work.  Both of my recent exs were drop out psychology majors in college.  My most recent ex, loves reading psychology today and a few months ago wouldnt stop talking about the scientific american issue she stole from work which was about the human mind, so she was fascinated.  Noticing a trend for sure... .and its been noted for my future dating reference.

[Mr Hollande]

Mine works as a carer for the terminally ill. She has dreams of becoming a nurse which I'm convinced will never happen.

[lemon flower]

well, there is some logic in their carreer choice, as they are quite familiar with the world of psychologists, therapists and social workers after all that happened in their lifes 

my ex mentioned a couple of times that he would want to work as a psychiatric nurse or with street kids, it's not difficult to understand where that comes from... .

in his case I don't see it happen as he is extremely unstable; changing his mind all the time, and suffers from severe addictions, but if he were high-functioning he might have succeeded somehow, after all he is intelligent, reflective, adaptive and a trained observer... .

still I wonder how they would act in the field: would they be able to diagnose patients objectively ? and what about the stress and the overload of emotional outbursts they'd have to deal with?

and shouldn't aspirant nurses, psychologists and social workers go through some psycological testings themselves before they are allowed to study or work in a social profit sector ?

would a pwBPD succeed in such testings ?

   

[slimmiller]

My exBPD is going to school to be a counselor and is currently working on her Bachelors with the plan of getting licensed. She also has a degree in Social services and almost had a degree in nursing but washed out of the program. She couldnt handle people that are sick

I asked her once during our breakup if a married woman was to come to her and relate the exact same scenerio (she was already sleeping with me replacement and still living with me) if she would tell her what she is doing is ok. She gave me the blank 'brain lock' BPD stare. Her brain could not process it and she didnt respond

I really wonder how much damage she is going to do to some poor sap that comes to her and really needs help but to be honest, she has lost janitorial jobs because she couldnt handle the stress. Mind you it was people stress and she did the work in offices after hours when there was no one there.

But to be honest I dont really wory about it too much for several reasons, first she cant even function normally as a parent and shes moved back in with her mother and is working part time jobs while she in full time bf control mode and a part time mom at 34. Dont think theres too much chance shes going to get anywhere near actual counseling work anytime soon

[MrFox]

My ex attempted to become a "life coach".  I heard she had gotten some certificate online and tried to transition her photography business into a life coaching business.  At first it struck me as funny.  How does one who can't manage their own life coach others?  Then I felt bad for anyone who went to her.  Waste of money and possibly life damaging.  Luckily, from what I have heard, she never got the whole thing off the ground.