Small Steps

[Katy-Did]

Recently celebrated my 23rd anniversary with my dBPDh.    Consequently, I've been reflecting upon the progress we've made as a couple as it pertains to the progress we've made as individuals.  Small steps.

Likewise, I experienced a productive conversation with a FOO-member who's struggling w/her uBPD son.  We were able to discuss destructive patterns of behavior without the veil of denial re-surfacing.  We gently discussed the need for counseling and was able to validate her perspective w/o too much of a struggle    Again, small steps. 

Not to say, the rescuer/caretaker in me STILL wants to take over and "fix" things. Fix my spouse... .fix my relative; but I'm learning.  Learning to look within--50+ years young and I'm just now acknowledging, recognizing, understanding and therefore... .monitoring the impulses.

Do they eventually fade? 

[Ihope2]

Dear Katy-Did

Many small steps make up one giant leap forwards!

It is very affirming to read about your 23rd anniversary with your BPD spouse, I am sure it has not been a very smooth road to travel for both of you.

Blessings 

Ihope2

[heartandwhole]

Do they eventually fade? 

They might!  And they might not. Either way, your acknowledgement and awareness of those impulses are testament to the peace in you that notices them in the first place. I think true freedom comes from embracing our "tendencies," even while working to change them.

It sounds like you have made great progress Katy-Did, something to be proud of!      Congrats on 23 years, that is wonderful.

heartandwhole