Anyway, I'll just have to be vigilant with trying to stay on top of the false statements somehow. And yes, there are 2 sides to everything. But additionally, my STBx is tenacious and getting people to take sides. And she's extremely smart. I'll just have to get through it.
A strange game. The winning move is not to play.
I understand the best man. My best man, is my best friend. He's known me for decades and I confided in him. He sort of understood, he's open-minded, an engineer and had a gf in the past diagnosed with Bi-Polar. He could empathize and was compassionate. That being said.
Much of the disorder and the acting out is behind closed doors away from what friends, family members, family doctors etc see. People that don't understand mental illness may not be able to interpret actions from a person with a distorted belief system and they'll get burnt out from listening to it.
Their perspective is from a logical or non-disordered mindset and applying logic to something they don't understand, a distorted belief system. It's not your obligation to explain or defend why and how she does what she does due to a complex and misunderstood disorder.
They may see a different person and not the person acting out. I suggest to not
JADE (Justify, Attack, Defend, Explain) her actions and your marriage to people. This was your marriage.
It's frustrating and scary when we don't have control over what another person says about us. Understand that she is saying such things (not all pwBPD, some do) because she's triggered by much anxiety and stress. It shall pass, the sooner you disengage, the sooner her distortions will dissipate.
What has you worried about what she may or may not say?
