Alienation and Grand Kids

[AVR1962]

For those who have been, or are currently, alienated by their adult BPD child, any of you have a relationship with your grandchildren from that child? Do you still continue to send cards and presents?

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Rapt Reader]

In the past, my Daughter-In-Law (who I do believe has, at the very least, BPD traits) has put off letting us see their only child, and our only grandchild. My son, who is her Husband, has gone along with that in order to keep the peace (which is what I like to tell myself, anyway   ).

At this time all is well, and we see our grandchild fairly regularly, but if things were like before I would still send cards and presents. I always want to keep the connection, and hope for the best... .And if a "No Contact" imposed (by them) would eventually be ended, I would want my behavior during the cut-off to be exemplar  

[mom2bpd]

Our BPDD alienated us from our GD that we have helped her raise. This went on for several months until her marriage blew up and she suddenly needed help. I continued to take things and leave them for our GD at their apartment door. It was one of the saddest things because I could not see that precious child for so long and knew they were punishing me by alienating her. When I did finally see her she was very withdrawn because she had been through hell for months listening to her mom and her husband yell at each other.  Let your grandchildren know u are thinking of them in any way u can. I know I was happy in hindsight that I did.