Does my Grandmother sound like a Borderline Waif?

[Depression = 72% of members]

Here's the evidence:

-Knocked up with 1st child at age 16.

-Claimed that my grandfather "date raped" her, yet stayed with him for several more years and had another child (my mother) with him.

-Remarried an abusive narcissist and remained with him for his death almost fifty years later.

-Manipulates and guilt trips her children and grandchildren.

-Phoney/Lies

-Will create situations where one of her children will fight with another to gain attention.

-Helpless victim. Incapable of taking care of herself. Would rather play the victim than do anything constructive.

-Creates drama wherever she goes.

-Few friends. Won't keep in touch with the friends she has.

-Dramatic displays to get attention.

-Will exaggerate illnesses to get attention.

-Plays favorites with family members.

-Lifelong depression and anxiety.

Borderline Waif or just toxic? I've distanced myself from her. I hate to put this way because it's not very nice, but she's in poor health and I wish she would just die peacefully. She's put a strain on my family my entire life and it's only gotten worse since her health has deteriorated.

[sweet tooth]

Here's the evidence:

-Knocked up with 1st child at age 16.

-Claimed that my grandfather "date raped" her, yet stayed with him for several more years and had another child (my mother) with him.

-Remarried an abusive narcissist and remained with him for his death almost fifty years later.

-Manipulates and guilt trips her children and grandchildren.

-Phoney/Lies

-Will create situations where one of her children will fight with another to gain attention.

-Helpless victim. Incapable of taking care of herself. Would rather play the victim than do anything constructive.

-Creates drama wherever she goes.

-Few friends. Won't keep in touch with the friends she has.

-Dramatic displays to get attention.

-Will exaggerate illnesses to get attention.

-Plays favorites with family members.

-Lifelong depression and anxiety.

Borderline Waif or just toxic? I've distanced myself from her. I hate to put this way because it's not very nice, but she's in poor health and I wish she would just die peacefully. She's put a strain on my family my entire life and it's only gotten worse since her health has deteriorated.

[HappyChappy]

Hi Sweet tooth,

I’m so sorry you having to go through this. In answer to your question the attributes you list certainly are part of being a BPD, but as we all demonstrate a bit of narcistic behaviour to one extent or another, really need to know someone well to confidently diagnose.

Why is the diagnosis important to you right now ? Are there tricky memories or behaviour you are trying to square off ?  

[sweet tooth]

Hi Sweet tooth,

I’m so sorry you having to go through this. In answer to your question the attributes you list certainly are part of being a BPD, but as we all demonstrate a bit of narcistic behaviour to one extent or another, really need to know someone well to confidently diagnose.

Why is the diagnosis important to you right now ? Are there tricky memories or behaviour you are trying to square off ?  

Trying to make sense why I always seem to get involved with toxic women. I think my family has a lot to do with it.

[sweet tooth]

I was involved with an uBPD woman for close to a year and she broke my heart. I'm trying to figure out why I tolerated the STs, flip-flopping, etc. Worse yet, I'm trying to figure out why I long for her and want her back. I'm a complete mess.