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Author Topic: Trying to figure out...  (Read 463 times)
kmmlmr2016
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Romantic partner
Posts: 1


« on: November 17, 2016, 02:05:27 PM »

I've been in a relationship for 5.5 years. We have a two year old and own a house together. If it wasn't for that I'd be done long ago! Looking for advice on how to deal or handle him.
He has always had Narcissistic qualities but didn't realize that could be part of this BPD as well. Which I've also always thought he's shown signs of. This website has now made me confidant that this is what I'm dealing with.

A few things we deal with on a daily basis. Everything is always my fault, he is very impulsive, rage, doesn't let me be me. He also no longer has a relationship with any of his family because they are always wrong as well.
How do I bring this up to him or do I not? Do I talk to his family about this?
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Meili
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 2384


« Reply #1 on: November 17, 2016, 03:03:00 PM »

Welcome

I'm sorry that you're having to deal with that. Hopefully this site will be able to help you learn to de-escalate a lot of his behaviors and keep yourself sane. The latter is the most important part!

There are some links in the sidebar to the right that can provide a good foundation for easing you pain and frustration.

With regard to telling him, are you talking about BPD or the things that you have to deal with? Either way, the early suggestion is no. The reaction that you receive will probably not help your situation at all.
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Mutt
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Relationship status: Divorced Oct 2015
Posts: 10403



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« Reply #2 on: November 17, 2016, 03:39:03 PM »

Hi kmmlmr2016,

Welcome

I'd like to join  Bullet: contents of text or email (click to insert in post) Meili and welcome you to  bpdfamily. I'm sorry to hear that. I agree with Meili that it's not a good idea to tell him that he is mentally ill. If we put ourselves in his shoes and we were told that we have a personality disorder, how would we react? I'd feel offended, angry and deny the accusation, it would feel like an accusation.

Excerpt
Do I talk to his family about this?

They have know him all of his life, family tend to be loyal to each other. They may also take it personally.
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