My daughter is 21 years old

[Baronesa]

My daughter is 21 years old. She went away to college and didn't finish her first semester. Since then we have been struggling to understand how to help her.
During high school she was a happy child, but she used to like to read very sad books about people with emotional problems. She also seemed to find people in school with emotional problems to open up to her. At that time I thought it was because she is very kind and helpful. Now I understand that she friended those people because they had a lot in common. When she returned from college she was a different person, she ran away, she got involved with drugs. I had to call the police maybe twice because she's so aggressive, they took her to a hospital, they talked to her and the doctors and nurses said that she was such a nice person and her aggressiveness was because the pot and was behavioral problems.
So after 3 years she visit a couple of doctors but never stayed in any treatment.
The last doctor who I have been seeing for almost two years and also saw my daughter a couple of times finally diagnosed her with BPD. She less aggressive now but her mood can change very fast. One day she hates the next day she loves me. She still using pot and has been consistent with her job. But unfortunately she quit school again because she was to stressed out with test and homework. My husband and I are trying to learn as much as possible about the disorder so we can help her.

Our objective is to better understand the struggles our child faces and to learn the skills to improve our relationship and provide a supportive environment and also improve on our own emotional responses, attitudes and effectiveness as a family leaders

[Naughty Nibbler]

Welcome Baronesa:  

I'm so sorry about your daughter's problems and the difficulty she is having.

I had to call the police maybe twice because she's so aggressive, they took her to a hospital, they talked to her and the doctors and nurses said that she was such a nice person and her aggressiveness was because the pot and was behavioral problems.

Did they do a drug test, when she went to the hospital? Just wondering if she could have had something in her system, in addition to pot.  Has she had any therapy?

She is less aggressive now but her mood can change very fast. One day she hates the next day she loves me. She still using pot and has been consistent with her job. But unfortunately she quit school again because she was to stressed out with test and homework. My husband and I are trying to learn as much as possible about the disorder so we can help her.

Does your daughter accept that she has BPD and needs help to manage it?  It will help her to learn some healthy ways to self-soothe and manage her emotions.

Have you asked her about the pot?  :)oes it help soothe her on some occasions and then agitate her at times?  I'm not a pot user, but I understand that there are different strains of pot and that some strains are more suited for certain problems.

The link below leads to a section, with a lot of helpful information for parents.

Lessons: What Can a Parent Do?

[Mutt]

Hi Baronesa,



I'd like to join Naughty Nibbler and welcome you to bpdfamily. How do you feel about the Dr's diagnosis, he's only seen her a couple of times and diagnosed her with BPD, it doesn't sound like they've had a lot of contact. Does he have experience with BPD? I'd like to suggest to you a book that will explain that BPD has a lot of other mental illnesses that are comorbid with it, mood disorders like BiP, anxiety disorders, depression, PTSD, ADHD and other personality disorders. It has more comorbidity than other mental ilness, experts don't know why, Dr Robert O. Friedel suggests that a pwBPD see someone experienced with the disorder, it can difficult to sort out all of the other disorders and sometimes a pwBPD are misdiagnosed.

I'm glad that you joined the group, it helps to talk to others, you're not alone.

Borderline Personality Disorder Demystified