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Before you can make things better, you have to stop making them worse... Have you considered that being critical, judgmental, or invalidating toward the other parent, no matter what she or he just did will only make matters worse? Someone has to be do something. This means finding the motivation to stop making things worse, learning how to interrupt your own negative responses, body language, facial expressions, voice tone, and learning how to inhibit your urges to do things that you later realize are contributing to the tensions.
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Author Topic: I'm ready to learn the tools VII  (Read 1316 times)
Oncebitten
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 627



« Reply #30 on: September 19, 2017, 02:26:41 PM »

I know that I cant control her and I cant change her.

I just dont know how to get past this incident with the other woman.  She still wants answers and details and at this point I dont have them.  i cant remember all of the details its been over a yr.  And between the lies I told and the things she said she believe how they were I just dont know anymore.

I feel like this is just a relationship issue, if we can get past this 1 thing then we could move forward.
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Site Director
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Gender: Male
What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 7054


« Reply #31 on: September 19, 2017, 02:58:36 PM »

... .if we can get past this 1 thing then we could move forward.

How many days in July and August did you stay at her place? How many days did she stay at yours?
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Oncebitten
*****
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 627



« Reply #32 on: September 21, 2017, 12:25:21 PM »

zero... havent seen her in 6 months
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Oncebitten
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What is your sexual orientation: Straight
Who in your life has "personality" issues: Ex-romantic partner
Posts: 627



« Reply #33 on: September 21, 2017, 03:25:28 PM »

its been suggested here before... .do I have a trauma bond with this woman?
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